He thought he woke up in another life—the blinding white ceiling didn't help to make him realize sooner that he was still a living mortal on the earth.
Crossing to the other side didn't sound so bad the moment he found that he had a few broken ribs and a dislocated ankle. There had been a good amount of stitches on his forehead too. He had to stay in the hospital. The horror in his mother's eyes escaped as a silent tell of what he had gone through to get all of that treatment. What he heard from the cops was far way more terrifying: a car tried to run him over, possibly on purpose and seemed like it all rounded up the bullying that happened to him these past four months.
However, Hokuto's life wasn't the only one that had gotten so fucked up.
Taiga. The oh-so-beautiful Kyomoto Taiga happened to be the key to this accident (and his savior, according to the police.) The doctor said he was using his body as a weight to make Hokuto get out of the car's way. He had injured both of his arms and his femur, but the most maligned part was that Taiga was also stabbed. He had woken up after a few days of being unconscious (just like Hokuto) but he refused to talk.
It triggered thousands of question marks inside his brain—never, ever, had Hokuto imagined that the popular boy in his year would risk his life just like that for someone like Hokuto. He only knew Taiga in passing; their lives are the total opposite, after all. He is used to the image “big nerd” people labeled him, avoiding every spotlight possible, completely spending his university days drowning in book after book. However, that’s the only thing that makes him happy. He always feels like he has nothing but his academics to rely on. He knew he couldn’t get everything in this world, so he tried so hard to excel in the very one thing he was good at: studying. It was just recently Hokuto got tangled into the rumor mills; he won the university’s research challenge and got to claim over one million yen to continue it, maybe that’s where the sparks started.
But Taiga? Honestly, Hokuto doesn’t even know that much about him. They don’t even go to the same department, he’s from the Music Department meanwhile Hokuto is stuck in Science and Technology, adding so much sense to his famous “big nerd” label. Taiga’s good at piano, yes. The brightest student in his department, yes. Won multiple arranging and composing competitions, yes. However, that was all. He never even got the chance to see his face up close until like … right now.
The police, even though Hokuto had just woken up, asked him to approach Taiga because Taiga might as well know the culprit. There were absolutely reasons for him to “totally shut his mouth up” (it’s what the police said.) His mother told him not to overdo it, said he could refuse since he is also a victim, and there’s no need to volunteer for them—but something about Kyomoto Taiga couldn’t get him to say no.
So here he was. In front of Taiga’s room.
It was empty.
The nurse said Taiga went to the hospital's greenhouse just now. She had a hunch that he probably was avoiding the detective. Hokuto chuckled a bit before striding his steps bigger to the mentioned place.
He didn’t even prepare any words. He didn’t even know why he agreed to the police’s instruction.
Maybe he just needed a reason to meet him. To say thank you.
And then he found him amidst the pink dahlia. He looked … serene. The last time he saw Taiga, his hair was fully blonde but now the black roots had started to grow. His face was still paler than ever, now accompanied by the lack of color from the hospital gown. This is the very first time Hokuto got to see him this close. He was indeed beautiful.
“Kyo … moto?”
The boy looked up and Hokuto swore he could see Taiga’s pupil grow bigger in surprise, though he didn’t budge. His fingers were still on the dahlia stem in front of him.
“Wh- What are you doing?”
Stupid question, Hokuto cursed to himself. However, Taiga excitedly lifted the small pot of dahlia he was observing and mouthed “they are blooming!” as the answer.
That. There was no way for Hokuto not to smile at that.
He walked to see the dahlia closer and as expected, it looked carefully taken care of. Hokuto couldn’t share the same excitement since he was wondering when is the right moment to say “thank you”. He really wanted to palm his face right here right now as he felt like he was acting too friendly for someone who didn’t know about the other that much.
“Your … wounds. Are you feeling good already? You should be resting.”
Taiga frowned but his thumb up told Hokuto the answer.
“I-” Seriously, Hokuto got frustrated over him not being able to form a word. “I really don’t know what to say, but thank you so much for saving me that night.”
He bowed deeply. So deep he was hoping he could just drop dead to the ground. There was no reaction for a while until he felt two hands trying to make him stand up straight and pulled him closer.
“I should be the one who said that,” Taiga’s voice sounded a little bit raspy, but surely, whatever sound he was to make, Hokuto would get flabbergasted because of their nearly none personal space. They were standing too close but Taiga continued, “You don’t know how much of a relief I am to see you alive, Matsumura.”
Everything was too much for Hokuto to process.
**
“It was the Dean’s son,”
His bully.
“He was my childhood friend.”
They chose to sit on the bench next to the greenhouse, intentionally, to avoid the crowds. Hokuto noticed Taiga had a hard time sitting down because of the stab wounds, immediately offering his hand to be the support.
“He … planned to drive you to the edge and to steal your research project.”
“For … what?”
“His father’s attention,” Taiga answered almost instantly. “And the money, of course.”
Hokuto wasn’t blind and surely, he had predicted that something like bullying or a little threat would find its way to him the moment his face was posted on the university’s website as the winner. The one that he didn’t include in the calculation was Taiga. And the incident. He really thought it wouldn’t go that far.
“I saw your presentation for the research challenge,” Taiga’s eyes wandered everywhere but Hokuto’s. “You were … shining. The spark in your eyes was not a lie. You definitely know what you’re doing.
“My father … he insisted that your proposal could be a brilliant idea to develop since you also included the gap in our learning management system’s website,” Hokuto could see Taiga’s hand trembling. “Ah, do you know Kyomoto Masaki from Science and Tech? That’s my father. He probably taught you calculus in class. I can’t really boast about it since according to people, going to the Music Department is such a waste of my talent in Math.”
That is new information to him. So maybe that’s why the Dean’s son happened to be his childhood friend. So maybe that’s why Taiga’s popular.
The tremble in Taiga’s hand didn’t look like it was gonna stop any time soon as he tried to explain more. Hokuto sighed, and then cupped both of Taiga’s hands in his palms.
“You don’t need to force yourself,” Hokuto said. “I want to know the truth, yes. But I don’t want to be the reason for you suddenly collapsing. You need to go back to your room.”
Hokuto was ready to drag Taiga up to stand, but the boy refused.
“Matsumura, you need to tell this to the police.”
“I already got the bigger picture of it. You can tell the details directly to them later,” Hokuto insisted. “Sorry, but I hate that this all happened because you helped me. I don’t want to hurt you again.”
Taiga still didn’t move from his place, but his eyes spoke something Hokuto couldn’t comprehend. He was too confused to translate it and maybe Taiga caught it, hence his fingers wrapped Hokuto’s wrist too tightly.
“This is not your fault and I don’t regret this, Matsumura,” Taiga said, full of determination. “I was willing to die for you that night.”
“But why, Kyomoto?”
“I don’t want to see the spark in your eyes die.”
**
So Hokuto walked him to his room. Taiga was very talkative throughout the walk, and Hokuto couldn’t wrap his head around the fact this is the boy that refused to talk to the police. He talked about everything but the incident: his Conan manga, his old iPod earphone that was just recently chewed by his dog, the tomato soup in the Music Department’s canteen—everything.
Nonetheless, the lively chat went to a halt the moment both of their eyes caught the two detectives waiting for Taiga in front of his room.
Hokuto was reluctant, that was obvious. He was then surprised when Taiga suddenly linked their fingers together.
"Ne, Matsumura. Wanna do something fun?”
**
Hokuto didn’t understand why they were running when they could blend among the crowds to hide from the police. It was almost like a shojo manga.
Taiga said he didn’t know where they were going, just going by instinct—but again, another shojo manga scene was about to roll in front of his eyes as Taiga led him to the hospital’s rooftop.
“I’m kinda glad you share the sentiment as me to the police,” in-between tired huffs, Taiga laughed at Hokuto. “You were also hesitant to see them, right?”
Hokuto nodded, despite feeling a little bit out of breath.
“Kyomoto, the wound,” even though he was still trying to catch the oxygen, Hokuto held out his hand to Taiga. He couldn’t help but worry.
“It’ll be fine,” Taiga just smiled it off and lay on a small bench near the rooftop’s door. “But I’m not gonna lie, it’s hurting.”
“We should go-”
“I don’t want to. Come on, sit with me,” Taiga patted the remaining space for Hokuto to sit.
Some part of him still wants to insist on going back to Taiga’s room—after all, this is their first day of being conscious after two days of nothingness. Nevertheless, the warm winds of Spring evening convinced him otherwise.
They didn’t say anything for a while. They were just two people, one sitting and one laying down, enjoying the remaining sunshine that almost touched the horizon. Hokuto felt funny for thinking his life was so fucked up this morning–because right now, it was the most peaceful moment he had ever shared with someone.
He peeked over to see Taiga, eyes entirely shut and mouth humming a melody.
“Clair de Lune, am I right?”
His lips curved into a smile. “So you remember.”
“You played that piece for the Student Fair in the second semester.”
“Yeah,” Taiga’s smile almost looked like a grin. It was certainly getting bigger. “That was the first time I noticed you. Heck, Matsumura. You sat in the front row and you were crying.”
Hokuto recalled it was the day he got into a fight with his mother. Before he got the chance to say his apology, she needed to attend a meeting in Hokkaido for a week. Hokuto remembered feeling really bad and listening to Clair de Lune—aka his mother’s favorite piece—didn’t help it to be better; even though he was going to the Student Fair in order to cheer himself up.
“I was wondering why would you cry because surely everyone in my department could play it better than me.”
“It was a bad time.”
“Ah, sou,” Taiga hummed. “Meeting me, does it count as a bad time?”
Hokuto immediately shook his head. “How about you? Is saving me considered a bad time?”
“I told you, right? I was willing to die for you that night.”
“I still can’t buy your answer, though,”
Catching what Hokuto meant, Taiga got up from his position and sat straight to see Hokuto eye-to-eye.
“I did follow you that night. I’m so sorry if I sound like a stalker,
“I overheard my father’s conversation on the phone about the Dean’s corruption. It was … bad. The money was supposed to be invested in the learning management system. It got worse the moment my father found out that the Dean was giving access from the website to a stranger for unknown reasons.”
Hokuto gasped.
“Your invention … Your proposal clearly stated that you were focusing on the security system and guaranteeing a more integrated space for students and professors to interact. Even adding more features to reduce add-ons. But something about the hole you were trying to fix irked him. He was trying to get you eliminated. Unfortunately, the other judges see the potential in you.”
“I wasn’t supposed to win, was I?”
“Stop it, Matsumura. You were the brightest among all of the contestants,” Again, Hokuto noticed the tremble in Taiga’s hands. “But they were … they were trying to rob it from you. Kentaro didn’t get along with his father and he would do anything to get his attention, that’s why my father asked me to keep an eye on him.
“I was so scared when I heard he was planning to kill you.”
All the oxygens seemed to dissipate around Hokuto. Restless, he really wanted to know more about this and was scared to know the truth at the same time.
“He aimed at your mental first. All the bullying, it was … it was part of his plan. I don’t know, and I don’t even want to know what’s on his mind, but I feel like he’s running out of patience,”
“So he tried to hit me with a car.”
“That was very stupid of him to do it by himself,” Taiga chuckled.
Shivers. His mind might still be too shocked to process Taiga’s story but his neuron surely knew how to react. He was so distracted he didn’t realize Taiga stood up from his seat and opened his arms.
“Matsumura, can I get a hug?”
“What?”
“Come on, please. I need it!” Taiga pulled his wrist to make Hokuto stand next to him and proceeded to crush him in a tight hug.
But it was warm; their shoulders touching, Taiga’s breath on his neck.
Taiga indeed said he was the one who needed it—yet Hokuto secretly hoped to steal more warmth than he had intended.
“We were just strangers yesterday. But I’m glad I’m a stranger that saved your life,”
“Shouldn’t we tell the police sooner about this?”
“I don’t know. I’m not known for being wise.”
Hokuto smiled, about to pull out of the hug. “You surely talked a lot. Promise me to do the same when they question you.”
Before he got the chance to release himself, Taiga pulled him closer, way too tight, and dunked his head on Hokuto’s shoulders.
“Way to ruin the moment. I still have something to say,” his voice was muffled.
“W-what?”
“The first semester,”
“Huh?”
“I lied about noticing you the first time at the Student Fair. It was the first semester. I saw you sleeping a lot in the library.”
Hokuto stunned. He didn’t even want to count on how many times he felt like the air got stolen around Taiga.
“I probably like you.”
“The first semester?”
“And every single day after that.”
That sounded so cheesy, Hokuto couldn’t hold his laugh. Apparently, Taiga didn’t like it and kicked him right on his femur.
“Kyomoto, I got a broken ankle and I just ran!”
Taiga released his hug and frowned. “And whose fault is that?”
“Hey, we’re still strangers. I’m the stranger you just saved, and you have the heart to hurt me?”
“You’re so dramatic.”
A wonderful melody of their laughter instantly crashed the air. They couldn't even contain to see each other's eyes straight because they always ended up laughing. The warmth just exploded, and Hokuto got to drown in them with Taiga.
It felt like another day of spring—when in fact, their lives were almost going down because of that incident.
However, Hokuto wouldn’t want to change it.
He was sure there were lots of bad times,
but certainly, this moment, right here, right now, with Taiga, is not one.