Rumor

"Woah!!! He's on this Bun**** again!!"

"Eh? Who?"

"Him!!! He was in this magz too a few months ago, wasn't he?!"

"Wow! You're right!! He's a famous actor… wait I can't remember his name… "

"Mat… Matsu-... "

"Matsumura Hokuto, baka!"

"Oh yes!!! Hokuto hahahahaha. I remember his face but not his name, haha."

"Baka!"

"I mean, look at him! He looks so damn fine omg! Look at that jawline!!"

"I know right?! No wonder he received a lot of dating rumors."

"Who else this time?"

"Here. Matsumura Hokuto (27) and Haruna Mizuki (25) were seen walking together out of an apart-... "

"Haruna Mizuki?! Omg she's my favorite actress!!! How dare you, Hokuto!!"

"Ayy, why are you annoyed hahaha"

"Haruna is innocent!! I don't want her to date someone like Hokuto!!"

"What's wrong with that? They look good together awwww. I like seeing them."

"How many pictures this time?"

"There are… 4 pictures. Oh look! They walked towards a cafe too!!"

"Why don't Hokuto confirm it?"

"He never confirms any dating rumors. I think it doesn't bother him. Or maybe they will just drop the info that they're married, awww."

"Awwww that would be so cute!!! I really hope this rumor will become true. Maybe they will announce their marriage aft-..."

Those girls had stopped their next word as they heard the sound of glass hitting the table. The sound that came from me. I was sitting across from them, wearing a groot t-shirt and a glasses. I stared at them while taking the last sip of my beer. I didn't have anything left so I stood up and glared at those girls that were whispering as they looked at me when I walked outside. 

**

Winter started a few days ago. It had been cold since evening and it was getting colder at night. I had been wearing my long t-shirt and brought my coat whenever I went outside, like today. I was coming back from work this Saturday. I had stopped by the bar close to my office to get some beer to warm me up. I felt cold, inside and outside. 

But I felt hot instead of being warm. I could feel the heat that probably came from my anger. It flared up inside me. I didn't even wear my coat as I walked under the moonlight. The cold air wrapped my body, but I couldn't feel it. I kept walking until I had stopped my footsteps as the voices of those girls that talked about those rumors—bullshit—echoing in my ears.

Haruna is innocent…

I don't want her to date him… 

I like seeing them together!!

I really hope this rumor will become true… 

… Maybe they will announce their marr-...

"STOP!! STOP ARGH!!" I yelled under my teeth as I placed my palms on my ears.

Thanks God I was alone in this fucking street and nobody saw me—well, if there was someone, I wouldn't give a fuck. It pissed me off and I just wanted to scream out loud.

"Mine!!!" 

"MINE!!!"

"HE'S MINE!!!!!" I screamed under my breath and gritted my teeth to hold my anger. I even clenched my hand into a fist and punched the air repeatedly as if it could ease my feelings. I stomped on the street as I walked away, hoping to leave the anger behind me.

But I walked too fast—or my visions had blurred, I didn't know. I didn't watch my feet as I tripped on a rock and fell down. The hissing that I spit out did not reduce the pain on my knees. I brought them closer to my chest and pressed it with my hands. I lowered my head and tried breathing steadily as I felt the silence start to wrap me tight in this cold night. 

It took a few minutes for me to calm before I raised my head and wiped the tears that had streamed down on my cheeks. I didn't even realize that I cried. Why did I cry? Was it because of the pain on my knees, or the anger inside me?

I didn't know.

I could only feel the lump in my throat.

I had to stand up now. I could feel the cold start stabbing me in my bones. I wore my coat and picked up my bag that was thrown forward. 

Stupid me.

That was so stupid of me.

I had to calm down. I had to take a deep breath or I might embarrass myself more than this.

I walked slowly—it was more like I dragged myself home, though. I didn't even realize that I had arrived. I had to reach for my key in my pocket, but I couldn't find it. I had looked inside my bag, yet I still couldn't find it.

Did I drop it accidentally?

But I was sure I didn't drop anything. My pocket wasn't torn either. Where did I put my key?

I was too lazy to walk again. I had no energy left. But I had to. The choice was only I walked again to find my key, or I slept in front of my own house and probably woke up at the police station because I was mistaken for a thief. And I didn't want the second choice. That would be too embarrassing. So I walked again. I walked properly this time because I didn't want to walk again. Thankfully I had found my key near where I fell earlier.

"I wish you could take me home, Hokuto… "

Nah. That was not cool. I could bear this shit.

I could just drag myself until I arrived at home like I did earlier.

As I arrived, I had placed all my stuff in my room, took a shower, and changed my clothes into pajamas. I walked to the kitchen. I wanted to feed myself before slept, but I didn't want to bother cooking. I checked my fridge and spotted a bowl of curry. I remembered I had cooked it, but I forgot when. 

… What if it was already stale?

Nah. Nevermind. I wouldn't die for eating a stale food, though. Also, I had checked this food and found nothing wrong with it. 

I would just heat it using the microwave.

I had put my curry in the microwave and waited for a few minutes. As I waited, I took a plate of rice that I had cooked this morning. It wasn't that much but enough to prop up my grumbled stomach.

I walked into my room to take my phone. I tapped the flat screen to check whether I had any notification. But nothing.

No messages.

No calls.

Nothing.

I sighed as I placed my phone on my desk. I wanted to send you a message but you hadn't even reply me yet since this morning. I guess you were just still busy with your filming. I closed my eyes to wash away my negative thoughts that wrapped my mind before I walked out of my room.

I took out my curry and moved it onto its plate, mixed it with my rice. I took a spoonful of it into my mouth, tasting it slowly.

I took another spoon of my food and chewed it again. It was delicious… 

It was delicious for an old curry. The taste hadn't changed. The meat and the veggies were still tender. It was the same as the first time I ate it.

It was… delectable. 

Thank you, Hokuto. Your recipe worked so well. You had teached me well how to cook this curry. It didn't taste exactly the same as your cook, though. But it was close enough.

It was close enough to your curry until it made me cry while eating it.

I took another spoon again and again. I closed my eyes, feeling the taste of this curry. I let my tears fall down on my cheeks as much as I chewed this food.

I hated the fact that I had to deal with this alone. Today was already a tiring day, then I had to hear those stupid gossip. I had to deal with my pain on my knees and the voices that kept echoing in my ears. I hated myself for being jealous just because of that.

I hated that.

I just really wanted to punch those shits away. Those were really bothered me because I knew it. I knew that you were with her. I knew the moment when you told me that you were outside with your co-workers at the filming site. I knew it wasn't the two of you alone. There were some people too. I remembered you had told me that you and your friend had to drive her home because she wasn't feeling well. I knew the whole story of that rumor. So I wasn't surprised when the rumor out because it had happened a few months ago, yet I was still jealous. 

I wanted to shout out my feelings.

I wanted to tell them who I'm for you. 

I wanted to tell them who you are for me. 

I hated that I had to keep my jealousy alone. I hated that. 

Nah. I shouldn't have thought about that… 

It was just another shit that I had to deal with for being the boyfriend of the most popular actor this year. It had happened a few times in less than a year. So I could deal with it. I had to, even if it was so difficult to do.

Hah! How pitiful myself!! I was sure if someone saw me crying just because of this simple thing, they might laugh at me. They might have thought that I was just being dramatic.

"What? You cried just because of that?"

"You knew about that, right? Why did you cry? Why did you think about those gossip?"

"Stop being dramatic, Taiga."

I could imagine they told me that. 

Hah! Fuck it!

Fuck for being dramatic. I was just missing you.

I had missed you… 

I had missed you so much until it was painful.

I hadn't met you for a month. We barely talked because your busy schedule. You texted me in the middle of the night, then when I replied, you didn't—probably because you were falling asleep, and I didn't want to wake you up, so I would just wait. 

We could only talk once in a week, somehow. If you weren't busy with your co-workers. I could understand that. And I didn't want you to think that I was such a possessive boyfriend—even though I really wanted to tell you to spend your time with me, especially at this time… 

Haaaah… 

"Enough with crying, Taiga… " I didn't even realize I had finished my curry because I couldn't stop the tears that kept falling from my eyes. 

I was such a mess… 

How bad I was for thinking like that about my boyfriend. My beloved boyfriend.

I would just sleep to bury these thoughts and this longing.

Yeah… I might feel better when I wake up tomorrow.

I had finished washing the dishes and cleaned myself, then I walked into my room. I had turned the lamp off and let the moonlight seeped in. I placed my phone beside me and closed my eyes as I hoped that I could see you tomorrow morning.

But suddenly I heard someone ring my bell. Who the hell was that? Was it another shit I had to deal with? I was too lazy to wake up but those stupid bells wouldn't shut up. I had forced myself to walk out and check it.

I was going to curse the person behind my door when I opened it, but all my words had stuck in my throat when I saw who it was.

It was you.

I forgot how to breathe. I was surprised when I saw you stand in front of my door, wearing a black suit and smiling softly at me. 

"Hi…"

I couldn't hold myself anymore. I had pulled you into my arms and buried my face in your neck as I filled my lungs with your scent.

You reached your arms around my back and buried your face in my shoulder.

How selfish I was for thinking that I was dealing with this thing alone. 

You missed me as much as I missed you. We had missed each other so much. I knew it. You hadn't said that, but I knew it. I could feel it.

"Will you let me in?" You asked me softly as you placed your hands on my cheeks. God knows how much I had missed your voice, Hokuto.

I nodded slowly and held your hand to bring you inside my house. As you closed the door, I buried myself again into your arms and hugged you tightly as if it could reduce my longing.

"I've missed you, Hokuto." I said behind your ears. I could feel you clenched your fist on my shirt, "I've missed you too, Taiga." You landed your kiss on my shoulder before you continued your words, "I'm sorry I left you alone for a month."

"Don't say that." I told you that because I had to. I didn't want to cry again in front of you. But it seemed like you had sensed something as you pulled yourself from the hug. I lowered my head as you looked at me. But you grabbed my face and landed your soft kisses on me. You traveled your kisses slowly on my cheeks, my nose, and my eyes. I had let myself dissolve in your touch as I closed my eyes. You placed your hands on my neck as you landed your soft lips on my lips. We kissed slowly and gently as if we were worried that the kisses might break us. I slightly opened my mouth as I gave you a signal to train your tongue inside me. I let out soft moans as you started grabbing my hair and pulled me closer to your chest.

Warm… 

It was warm.

It was so warm until I felt like I started burning. You had let go your kisses from my mouth and moved it on my neck. I couldn't hold myself as I clenched my fist in your hair, making you suck my neck deeply and bit it. God, you were so hot. I wanted to taste you again so I pulled your hair and landed my kisses on your lips. I sucked it and opened it by biting your lower lip.

I wanted to taste you.

I wanted to touch you.

It was my turn to train my tongue inside you. All I could hear were just our moans and our heart pumping. Our soft breathing just turned me on. You grabbed my face and brought it closer to you. I felt like my heart was going to explode when you looked at me with those eyes, full of desires.

"Hokuto… " I called you breathlessly before smooching your lips. "Yes, Taiga…" You answered as you held my face. I saw your pupil dilated and it was just like you lit a fire inside me. I had curled my legs around your waist and smooched your swollen lips again. You brought me into my room and threw me on my bed.

The room was still dark but I could see your beauty between the moonlight. I sat up and backed up on my bed as you crawled up to me. I curled my legs around your body and kissed you hungrily. The clashing of our teeth and the sound of our tongues caused a fire inside me. I placed my arms on your broad shoulders as you tried hugging me on my waist.

I forgot that tonight was cold. I just felt the heat around us. I let out a moan when you reached my ear, biting it gently. I pushed my head back to give you more space to taste me, sucking me deeply, marking me as yours. I guess you could feel the vibration on my throat as I groaned. I clenched my fist in your hair. I was sure you were turned on too as you had started traveling your kisses on my collarbone, sucking it deeply. You took my buttons off one by one as I sucked your lips, didn't let you rest to take some breath. You had moved your swollen lips on my chest, sucking hard my sensitive nipples when the other one was busy being played by your cold fingers. Oh God it was so damn good. I couldn't deny I had been sexually frustrated even though we had sex on call or text somehow. But having sex with you directly was still the best. 

"Ahhhh fuck!!!" You bit harder on my other nipple. God you were so hot. You were so fucking hot. I had turned on and I knew you felt the same too. I could feel your shaft hardening on my thighs.

Alright, it was enough for me.

"Let me do this to you." I said as I grabbed your face and brought you closer to me. I wanted to taste your lips again before I tasted another part of you. I sucked your swollen lips, harder this time, traveling my tongue again inside you as if I forgot your taste earlier. I landed my kisses on your neck and pushed you slowly to lay on my bed. I sucked your Adam's apple, the sexiest part of you—one of my favorite parts of your body— many times until you groaned in pleasure. I sucked it while my fingers took off your buttons hurriedly. I moved my kisses on your chest—your broad chest and traveled it on your abs. I really love your abs. It wasn't that much but it was beautiful. I could stare at it as long as I wanted. But I wanted to please you. I reached your nipples and played it with my fingers. I always loved how your body shivered just by my touch.

"You're so sensitive." I teased you before I sucked your nipple. You let out your moans as I sucked it and bit it gently. I had let myself play with your hardening nipples for a few minutes, pleasing you with my touch.

"Taiga…" You called my name softly and it just made me want to move myself on your other body.

I wanted to suck your dick.

I lowered myself to your waist and took off your belt. I looked at you who was watching me, looking worried, but I knew you wanted it too, as much as I wanted you. I lowered your pants and freed your shaft.

Fuck, Hokuto. I had seen it many times, but your size never failed to surprise me. It was so big. So fucking big. 

"You really love my touch, huh?" I teased you again as I touched your tip. It was already hard and covered by precum. I couldn't wait to suck you but I wanted to tease you. I licked your precum before I put the whole shaft in my mouth. I saw how your body shivered by my tongue and I really loved that. I took your cock inside and pleasured you.

Shit, Hokuto… I almost gagged when you jerked your waist. Could you please calm down? I would do my best to you, don't worry.

I had slurped your cock again and again to bring more pleasure to you. I could feel you were close to your peak as you grabbed my hair, calling my name in your moans.

"Taiga, wait, please! Ahhh… "

"I want to finish ins- ahhh… inside you!!" You told me breathlessly as you pulled my hair, but I was a stubborn. I kept your shaft inside me until you released your cum. I swallowed them then I freed you. I looked at you, who was sweating a lot on this cold night. You liked it, didn't you? I knew you did.

You reached my face and wiped the milk around my lips by your warm finger. We smiled softly as we looked into each other.

That felt so good. I laid myself on your chest, feeling your heavy breath and your heartbeat. You stroked my head gently and rested your other hand on my back.

As I closed my eyes to get some sleep, a storm had come through my mind, bothering me again. 

"I like seeing them together!!" 

"I really hope this rumor will become true…"

" … Maybe they will announce their marr-..."

Ah shit!!! Why did those rubbish come again?! Why couldn't I throw them away?! Shit! SHIT!!

My drowsiness had disappeared. My eyes had widely opened. I had woken up again and sat above you this time. I didn't see how you looked at me as I took off my own pants, freeing my own shaft that had been hardened since I sucked yours. I had spread my legs and positioned my entrance in front of your cock, but you held my thighs as you tried to say something.

"The lube, Taiga! The lube! I don't want to hurt you. Give me the lube before—" I told you I was a stubborn. I knew we didn't have sex for a month and it might be so painful for me, but fuck lube. I didn't need it. I wanted you to be inside me! I had groaned because of the pain when I took you inside. There were mixed feelings between the pleasure, the pain, and the anger that kept raging inside me.

I brought my hips up and down as I moaned, trying to wash away the storm inside my mind. I couldn't even hear your moans as I grinded, pushing you deep inside me. I could feel you scratching my thighs as I groaned in pleasure. 

"They look good together."

"I really hope this rumor will become true."

He's mine!!

HE'S MINE!!!

MATSUMURA HOKUTO WILL ALWAYS BE MINE!!!

"Ahhhhh!!! Fuck!!!" I screamed as I tried to cover the voices in my ears. I thrusted harder this time as I felt my blood running in my veins. My raging anger had taken my whole body. I even spelled word by word with my hips, marking you as mine. 

"You!!" 

"Are… "

"Mine!!"

I said those words as I grinded and spelled them with my hips, causing the pain inside me, but I didn't fucking care. I started to hear your moans as I grinded again.

"Ahhh… Taiga… Holy shit that was so… Ahhh… So fucking good!!!" I smirked as I heard your words. I could feel your cock was getting harder and harder. I even thought that my ass would be torn apart. Thankfully I got used to your size.

I reached your hand, guided you to touch my cock as I neared my peak. You squeezed my hardened cock and played it. Meanwhile I was busy pushing you deeply.

Oh God I couldn't stop groaning. 

We couldn't stop jerking.

I screamed your name as I reached my peak. 

We were close, so close, and I kept going up and down and faster my rhythm to pleasure us until I felt you had come inside me. I had spilled my own milk in your hand too.

We were both sweaty and sticky and I didn't feel the cold air at all. 

I lowered my body and kissed your lips as you hugged me tightly. We tried to catch some air to breathe steadily. You wiped my sweat on my forehead and tucked my hair behind my ear. I had moved my body to lay beside you as you tried to sit. I felt sleepy and closed my eyes, but then you surprised me by your loud voice.

"Ta-Taiga!! You're bleeding!!!"

***

You had come back with the first aid kit in your hands. You took a seat beside my legs and treated my wound. Honestly, I had forgotten this thing when I had arrived at my house. That was why I didn't even treat them properly. Maybe my wound was rubbed on the surface of my bed, or when I was spreading my legs wide… I didn't know. I wasn't sure.

I hissed as I felt the pain when you touched my knees, making you worried.

"Just a little bit, okay." You told me softly. I had gritted my teeth to reduce the pain.

As you finished, you placed back the first kit on my desk, then sat beside me. I lowered my head as you looked concerned at me.

"Taiga… What happened?" You asked softly as you grabbed my shoulders. "Why did you cry? Did someone hurt you?" you continued. I turned my face towards you, looking confused.

But you smiled softly and landed a kiss on my temple. "Why do you think I kissed your eyes earlier?" You told me with your soothing voice, gently caressing my face. I had to cover my face with my palms as I felt embarrassed.

"No. Nothing. I can't tell you. It's too embarrassing."

"Hey… " You called me and tried to open my palms. 

"Hey, love. Look at me."

Calling me like that was unfair. You knew my weakness, Hokuto. "You can tell me anything. I will never laugh at you. I want you to be honest, okay?"

I lowered my palms and looked at you while pouting.

"I… I heard the rumor today… "

"I heard the rumor about you and Haruna… " I could see you looked surprised. You were going to say something, but I had stopped you by my words. 

"I heard what people said about you two. How they want to see you with her. How good it would be if you dated her." I took a breath and swallowed the lump in my throat. "I… I knew I could just ignore them. But it pissed me off." I lowered my head before continuing my words. 

"I wanted to shout out my feelings and tell them that you are mine."

"They also said how you seem unbothered with it, and they started wishing that the rumor might be true." I clenched my hand into a fist as I held back my anger. I didn't want you to see me like this. I didn't want you to see me being jealous just because of this stupid rumor.

But instead of giving any defense, you grabbed my head and hugged me tightly.

"I'm sorry…" You said while stroking my hair gently. "I should have thought about your feelings more… " You kissed my crowns, making me soft and I couldn't hold my tears. I felt bad for thinking like this about you who loves me this much.

"Don't cry, love." You said as you wiped my tears. You held my face and looked at me sincerely. "I know I'm still not good as your boyfriend, but I want you to know that you're the only one for me. I will never leave you. I will never see anyone. You're the one for me. Only you." You kissed my lips softly as if I was so fragile. I broke the kiss and hugged you tightly, burying my face in your broad shoulder.

"I'm sorry… I should have done that. It was so selfish of me." I said while sobbing.

"And please don't say that you're a bad boyfriend because that's not true. You're the best!" I pecked your neck before tightening my arms around you. You kissed my temple again to calm me and tightened your hug, pulling me closer to you.

How selfish I was for thinking like that about you. 

How selfish I was for thinking that I was alone.

How stupid I was for thinking about those shits. 

I should have forgotten it. I should have thrown them away.

"Do you want me to confirm it?" You asked me after letting go of our hugs, pushing my bangs and tucking it behind my ear. I shook my head gently and pecked your lips. "You don't have to." I gave a radiant smile to you.

We brushed our noses as we smiled happily at each other as if we were the happiest couple on earth. 

"Btw why did you come without telling me?"

"Did I tell you that I've missed you so much?" You said and kissed me gently. I let out a chuckle as I asked for more kisses. 

"Actually, I have something to tell you." You said in front of my lips. I had broken our kisses as I sensed something serious around us. I looked at you in concern as you grabbed my arms.

"I finished filming this morning. And I don't have any schedule for the next two months."

I nodded slowly as I waited for your next words. I didn't know why I was worried to hear that.

You reached something in the first aid kit and took a small box outside. My eyes widened and my mouth slightly opened as you handed me the box. 

"I know you might think it'll be too early for us because we just started dating for less than a year. But as you know, I have been in love with you since many years ago. And I'm sure about this." I saw you formed a thin line on your lips then lowered your head. You took a deep breath and opened the box slowly.

"Kyomoto Taiga… "

"Will you spend your entire life with me?"

I covered my ugly mouth with my palm and my vision had blurred. You never failed to touch my heart, Hokuto. And it was amazing how smooth you were saying those sweet words. I felt like I was over the moon after hearing it. It was unbelievable even though I had imagined you told me something like this a few times.

I didn't want to make you wait for my clear answer. So I gave you an obvious nod. I saw the way you reacted over my answer and I knew, I wasn't the one who was overjoyed by this. 

You put the ring on my finger and landed a softest kiss on my forehead. We both cried in happiness as we fell into our hugs. 

"You're mine, love. And I'm yours."

I would never care about any rumors in the future. Having you by my side was enough. We don't have to bother telling other people about us. It was clear enough that you're mine, and I'm yours.

And it was clear enough that we love each other.

"Shall we take a shower or sleep?" You asked me gently. 

"I'm sleepy. I want to sleep."

I had moved my body and let you laid beside me. You placed your arms under my head and pulled me closer into your neck.

"I love you, Hokuto."

"I love you more, Taiga." 

I smiled softly as you lightly patted my back. I closed my eyes slowly and felt your heartbeat.

How lucky I am for having you.

How lucky I am for being your boyfriend. 

Thank you for coming to my life.

I'm looking forward to spend my time with you, Hokuto.

My beloved, Hokuto.