H.R.H.

Year 566 AD – Year of the Wooden Horse 

Thunder came down like wrath from the heavens, while others trembled from fear of being struck; it was not a concern for the two men in bed. Sheets barely covered their nakedness, their chest heaving after an intense lovemaking, and although their bodies were spent, their minds remained in chaos. 

Well, at least to one of them. 

Taiga stared longingly at Hokuto, brushing away his long jet-black hair that covered his face. Men envied Hokuto not just for his intellect, but also for his face, which the heavens sculpted to look sharp but refined, hard yet gentle.

“Are you done staring?” 

Taiga didn’t answer as Hokuto looked back at him. His eyes were the sharpest of all his features; they always pierced through Taiga’s soul, and he knew he could never hide secrets from Hokuto.

“Hokuto, would you wish we were born…differently?” 

Hokuto sighed and lay on his back. “What could be more different than this? Are you referring to our station? Gender? Circumstance?”

“I guess all of it.”

“I don’t wish to be born different, I just wish for life to be a little bit easier.” 

Taiga leaned for a kiss, tasting the saltiness of Hokuto’s tears, and wishing for time to stretch.

 “I will never stop apologizing–”

“Don’t,” Hokuto stopped him, drying his own tears. “I also wanted this, and even for the last time, let me love you, your Royal Highness.”

Taiga welcomed Hokuto's desire, reciprocating it with the same hunger that could never be satisfied. Taiga knew he should put an end to it, but the more he thought of ending it, the more his cravings grew. And the more he hurts Hokuto. 

Thunder continued to rumble, muffling their moans, and no storm could put out the fire inside. It would continue to burn until one of them dies. 

One year later, Year 567 AD — Year of The Fire Goat

Hokuto increased his pace as he neared the King’s private study. He had been requesting a private audience for months and he was only granted just when he was busy preparing to leave. 

“The Minister from The Ministry of Justice, Matsumura Hokuto,” Eunuch Wei announced and Hokuto entered with his head bowed.

“Long Live, Your Majesty,” he said, curtsying. 

“You may rise.”

Hokuto rose, and it felt like a decade since he last looked directly at Taiga. The last time they met without anyone else in the room was the day before Taiga got married. An event Hokuto had to witness while his heart twisted in pain. 

And six months later, Taiga ascended to the throne and became the King. It might be an overreaction to say that the nation has aged Taiga. While Taiga retained his ethereal looks, one couldn’t deny his features had hardened; lines were prominent, his brows and lips in perpetual doubt and worry. 

“I apologize for just calling on you now when you’re preparing to leave for Zhou.”

Hokuto managed to smile bitterly. Their conversations seemed to always start with apologies. “There was no need for apologies, Your Majesty. I should be the one apologizing for demanding your time when you have been busy since your coronation.” 

“Let’s get to the business then, why do you wish to see me?” 

“It’s about the alliance with Zhou.” 

Taiga lowered his eyes. 

“I understand that Zhou personally requested me to lead the delegation, and I just want to confirm the swirling rumors that this alliance involved marriage. My marriage,” he emphasized.

Taiga turned to his eunuch, and in seconds, everyone in the room left. Just the two of them again, face-to-face and away from prying eyes. However, what didn’t change is the fact that Hokuto will always be Taiga’s subject. 

“It would be for your own advantage, Matsumura,” said Taiga, his face suggesting that Hokuto should have figured that out instead of asking him. “You may be the minister, but people still looked down on you for not being of noble birth. You also have no powerful family as backing, but if you become a Prince Consort, the entire Zhou will be your ally.” 

Hokuto clenched his hand into a fist. There was a time when he did want to be a prince consort, Taiga’s prince consort. But it was all a dream, a delusion at best. 

“Gaining an ally also means gaining an enemy. Which enemy are we talking about?” Hokuto was aware that it was the Zhou who offered an alliance treaty. They needed Taiga’s power, and he had failed to deduce that yet.

“There’s no enemy yet, but there’s nothing wrong with preparing. As the Justice’s minister, you should know some people keep their blade sheath until it is time to attack.”

Hokuto nodded. Restlessness grew since Taiga took the throne, with factions shifting among Taiga’s and the late King, the Queen, and even the Consorts.  

“I understand, Your Majesty, if this alliance would help to lessen your worries, then, I’m gratified to be of your service.”

“I wish you success, Matsumura.”

Hokuto always loved Taiga’s eyes and for a split-second, Hokuto thought he saw his eyes waver. But even if Taiga wavered, what could a subject like Hokuto do? 

“Why don’t we just run away from all of it?”

Taiga’s eyes widened at his daring, and before Taiga could say anything, he quickly rectified his boldness. “Forgive me for jesting, Your Majesty. It was distasteful and I would reflect on it.”

“You may reflect on it on your way to Zhou. You may leave.”

“Long live, Your Majesty.” He bowed once more and left.

Six years later, Year 573 AD — Year of the Water Snake

Fire rages around Taiga, the heat seeping through his skin, cooking him from within. But the chaos around him didn’t faze him; he didn’t care about dying, he had issued a decree, and he would never know its outcome. 

“Even dying won’t give me comfort.” 

He opened his drawer and pulled out a letter. It was the last letter Hokuto wrote to him. Taiga thought Hokuto would be pleading for his innocence, begging for his mercy to at least save his family, but Hokuto remained unpredictable up to the end. Hokuto’s last letter only stated, “What happened to us?” 

He hugged the letter, the fire was so hot his tears had dried. Thinking about what could have been was no longer an option. It was too late for regrets; hell is waiting for him. 

***

“Coward,” Hokuto whispered as he glared at the teacup, a colorless poison waiting for him to be drunk.

He looked up at the smug face of the Queen. She had always looked at Hokuto with animosity, and if he could hazard a guess, the Queen’s faction played a huge role in his apparent demise. How could they be so blind?

“I’m honored that His Majesty personally sent Her Majesty to witness me drink this poison,” he said. He thought he was going to be angry, but he was unbelievably calm. Maybe the prospect of dying since leaving Taiga’s side had always been at the back of his mind. But he didn’t expect it to be this way; being accused of treason has been very insulting. Between Taiga and him, Taiga betrayed him first. 

“You are very special to His Majesty, so I’m sent here as his representative.” 

He looked at the Queen sharply; he didn’t miss the undertone when she mentioned, “special”. Whether or not she had any idea, it didn’t matter anymore, but he guessed he could rile the queen even at the end. 

He took the cup and raised it toward her, “My sincerest thanks to Her Majesty for sending me back to His Majesty.”

Her eyes widened, while he remained smiling even as the poison ravaged him. 

Year 562 AD – Year of the Water Tiger

“Matsumura Hokuto!” 

Hokuto opened his eyes, startled by a familiar voice, before he lost his balance and found himself looking at the blue sky as he landed on a garden of pebbles.  

“Were the first two parts that hard?”

“Master…Pei?” He asked in disbelief. His teacher helped him up, while he stared dumbfounded.  He remembered his teacher with a head full of silver hair, and seeing him with black hair and a trimmed beard was disconcerting. After all, the last he heard, his master had been killed simply for siding with Hokuto. 

“You seemed unsure of your teacher’s name.” 

“Well, I’m just–is this heaven?” Hokuto looked around. The pebble garden where he fell was a famous fixture in front of the Hall of Prominence, an elevated pavilion in the middle of a man-made lotus pond where banquets were mostly held. 

“In the end, heaven just looked like the palace grounds?” He was a bit disappointed; the monks clearly didn’t know what they were talking about. 

“Did you bash your head while taking the Civil Service Practical Exam that you turned…crazy?” Master Pei asked while he whirled a finger on his temple. 

“Civil Service Exam?” He clarified. In his life, he had only taken one Civil Service Exam, which he aced, and he became part of the Imperial Secretariat. 

A gong rang that disrupted his thoughts. Master Pei and he turned to the bridge entrance that led to the Hall of Prominence. A man in blue robes with his two assistants appeared with a scroll. Hokuto knew the man; he worked with the said man at the Secretariat.

“In thirty minutes, we would begin the panel interview, and this evaluation would amount to 20% of your total score…”

He heard sighs of frustration behind him. He wasn’t paying attention earlier, but he recognized most faces. He had seen all of them when he took the Civil Service Exam after he had his coming-of-age ceremony at 20.

“Are they all dead too?” 

“The panel will consist of the Head of the Ministry of Personnel, the top scorer of the previous Civil Service exam and current Chief Steward of the Secretariat, and His Royal Highness, the Crown Prince.” 

The gong was rung once more, and Hokuto felt its waves reverberate in his heart. He didn’t know what was happening, but he should no longer be that 20 years old who had never met the Crown Prince. He should no longer be that greenhorn who fell in love at first sight. Yet here he was, rattled by the mere mention of Taiga’s official title.

“Interesting,” said Master Pei while he stroked his beard. “That’s probably the Crown Prince’s first official assignment since His Majesty announced him as his heir. You should take advantage of this. His Highness is known for sympathizing with the commoners.” 

Hokuto turned to his master. It was summer, yet he could feel the chill deep in his bones. “Master Pei, what year are we?” He asked with dread.

Master Pei flicked his forehead. “Wake up, Hokuto, you need to pass this and bring glory to Matsumura clan. How could you not know it’s the Year 548, the reign of the Azure Dragon King?”

His eyes widened as he staggered to remain upright. 

“Hokuto, are you okay?” Master Pei asked with worry as he caught him. 

Cold sweat dotted his forehead as he asked his teacher another question, “Master, how old are you?”

“I just reached my golden age before the peach blossoms bloomed,” he replied, still frowning. “Ahh…you need some sweets. I’ll get you something sweet. Stay here.” 

He watched his master walk away while his heart drummed like crazy. Did he die only to return to the past? Or did he see the future and go back to the past? What kind of sick and twisted fate did the heavens bestow upon him?

“Here, eat this.” 

He looked at the red bonbon in his palm. It was a court favorite, cherry bonbon with a hint of citrus.  

The gong sounded again and he turned toward the entrance. 

“The following examiners shall make their way to the Hall of Prominence…Examiners 1 to 6.”

“That’s you,” Master Pei said, pointing at the wooden tablet engraved with the number six. “Good luck.”

“Uhm, master, may I implore you to give me some advice?”

“Can it not wait until after the interview?”

Hokuto shook his head. The moment he stepped on the bridge leading to the hall meant choosing a fate that would end in a tragic death.

“Very well, what is it?”

“If you get to live your life again, will you make the same choices?”

“Hmmm, that’s quite a lot to take in, but as we are pressed for time, yes, I would probably make the same choices.”

Hokuto was still doubtful. “Even if–even if it kills you?”

His master went silent for a bit before he turned toward the pond. “Have you heard of the Legend of the Veil of Sorrow?”

He nodded. The Veil of Sorrow is one of Great Ying's most famous natural attractions, with turquoise rivers that run between towering cliffs. 

“Treat your life like its turquoise river, you can’t change its course by moving some stones, you have to cut through the mountains! Only then will the river flow the way you intended.”

“Master…”

His master patted his shoulder, “Go and change the trajectory of your water.” 

He swallowed the lump in his throat before he popped in a bonbon. The Hall of Prominence looked more imposing as he walked along the bridge. He closed his eyes to calm his nerves. The heavens had given him another chance to live, an opportunity to try again. 

“Hokuto, would you wish we were born…differently?”

He opened his eyes as he reached the end of the bridge. Taiga is still the Crown Prince, and he is an incoming civil servant. They were still in the same circumstances, and he’d seen how life had turned out. 

He glanced at his hand and imagined a hammer. The mountain in front looked impenetrable. Can he really change the course for Taiga and himself?

He stepped inside and braced himself. 

Year 562 AD – Year of the Water Tiger 

“Hokuto, would you wish we were born…differently?”

Taiga watched as Hokuto stepped out of the Hall of Prominence. His teacher, the renowned Master Pei, met him with a tight hug. If the Matsumuras managed to convince a former Imperial Tutor to come out of retirement and teach Hokuto, it meant Hokuto was really gifted.

“Your Highness, we should get back to the Red Hill Palace, remember that you didn’t attend the panel interview because you’re supposed to be ‘too drunk to get up’,” said Kochi with air quotes. He looked at Kochi, and just like this morning, Taiga felt his heart swell. Kochi became his Chief of Household when Taiga became the heir apparent. However, Kochi still preferred to follow him around and act more like his attendant than his household chief. And later, when he became the king, he and Kochi would have a massive fall-out that Taiga regrets to this day. 

“Kochi, it’s nice to be 21 again.” 

Kochi frowned. “I’m 22 and so will you in a few months. And ‘again’? How many times did you become 21?”

Taiga sighed and whirled back to where Master Pei and Hokuto once stood. He had no idea what had happened; he was expecting hell, but he woke up at the Red Hill Palace, with Kochi panicking because of some personnel changes and Taiga having to oversee a panel interview. And that was when he learned that he was back at the reign of his father, the Reign of the Azure Dragon King. He was still the Crown Prince, and there would be 11 years to go before he would be crowned as king.

Today was supposed to be the first time he met the young Matsumura Hokuto. Taiga had gotten used to praises on his beauty, which sometimes became a source of envy from the princesses, but when he saw Hokuto, he thought he had finally met his rival. 

The other panelist gave Hokuto a hard time, for he was not a graduate of the Imperial College, nor was he of noble birth. His father was the son of a concubine, and his mother came from a merchant family. Although they have wealth, they don't have prestige. It was the first time Taiga used his rank to pacify men who were older than him. He had to remind them that the Civil Service exam was administered to combat nepotism; thus, they should judge applicants based on their intellect and skills, not their family background. 

Hokuto said he fell for Taiga at first sight, but maybe he did, too. Hokuto answered all questions with grace, and Taiga silently cheered for him. 

“And I will continue to cheer for you, Hokuto. I don’t know if I went back to the past or if I’ve seen the future, but I know one thing for sure, another lifetime isn’t enough to atone for what I did to you. Stepping away is the biggest grace I could give you.” 

He turned, and as he moved farther from the Hall of Prominence, he was also moving away from having his fate get entangled with Hokuto. Their first meeting cemented their tragic fate, and as heaven willed for him to live another life, he should know better than to make the same mistake.

“Loving you was a mistake; a beautiful mistake. A proof that something wrong can never be right.” 

“Are you crying, Your Highness?” 

He touched his face and felt his tears roll down. “I think I’m allergic to something,” he lied, drying his tears. 

“If I may be so bold, Your Highness…”

“Go on.”

“Since you woke up this morning, you’ve been melancholy. Perhaps you had a bad dream?” 

Taiga managed a smile. If there was a space between death and hell where one gets to re-live their life, then he is living in it.

“You’re right, I had a bad dream,” he said. “And I have to make sure it remains a dream.”

“You got full marks on the written and practical exam, but you failed the interview? How did you answer?” 

Hokuto shrugged casually despite his master’s distress. It had been a week since the exams, and the results were finally announced. In the past, Hokuto’s exam results made him a Rank 1 official, and he became the youngest aide in the Secretariat. His Majesty assigned Hokuto to be directly under the Crown Prince. Now, he’s a Rank 13 official with no official posting, and he assumed he would definitely be assigned to some far-flung province. 

“Did you offend any of the interviewers? Did you offend the Crown Prince?” 

“About that, the Crown Prince wasn’t even there,” said Hokuto. “I guess the past has started changing,” he added in a whisper. 

“The Crown Prince wasn’t there, but why?”

He did ask the same question. He was too surprised not to see Taiga, so he just blurted it out. 

“The Princess Royal replaced him, she said her brother was indisposed.” Hokuto was aware of the animosity between Taiga and most of his six siblings. 

“Are you happy with this result?” asked Master Pei. 

Hokuto wasn’t happy. His teacher trusted him, his father pinned his hopes on him, and his mother used most of their savings to finance his studies and coax Master Pei to return from retirement. How could he be happy? Hokuto wasn’t satisfied with the result, but in the grand scheme of things, Master Pei and his parents would live to old age. A privilege denied to them when Hokuto was branded for treason. 

“Well, I’m still an official,” he said lightly.

Master Pei sighed heavily as though Hokuto’s current ranking weighed him down. 

“Uhm, master, if my mother promised you a bonus if I got in, I’ll be the one to give it once I start receiving a salary.”

Master Pei sighed once more as he fanned himself. “I never accepted a cent from your mother. And I’m so ashamed to face them.”

Hokuto went down to his knees and kowtowed to his master. “I’m sorry for disappointing you, Master.” 

“Get up. You got full marks in written and practical exams, I’m sure there’s no one else more disappointed than you. What are your plans now?”

He straightened his back. “I’m planning to return to Jinnian while waiting for a post.”

“I see. You’re still registered as my guest. I’ll send a runner if we receive one. When will you leave?” 

“To combat heat, I’m planning to travel at night, so by sunset.” 

 “Okay. Stay safe, Hokuto.”

He bowed again. “Thank you, Master.

***

“That sister of mine definitely told the others to fail him,” Taiga complained as his carriage rocked. He and Kochi were on their way to the Imperial Tombs, where Taiga was ordered to pray and reflect after neglecting his royal duty.

“Even if the princess didn’t, it was your fault to shirk your duty in the first place,” chided Kochi.

“Whose side are you on?”

Kochi ignored him and continued cracking and munching the sunflower seeds he brought as a snack.

He read the Civil Exam results and saw how Hokuto’s top score became one of the lowest. In the past. Hokuto answered marvelously, so Taiga thought his sister gave Hokuto a hard time. The Princess Royal was quite a snob, preferring pedigree over everything else, a pride she later swallowed when she told the King she fancied Hokuto as her Prince Consort. Hokuto was only 28 years old then, and Taiga moved heaven and hell to stop the marriage from happening.

He blamed himself for this miscalculation. He should have known that his sister and the other nobility would drag Hokuto’s scores to give their candidates leverage. 

“We’re here!” Kochi announced.

“Time sure moves fast when I’m about to suffer.”

He could only sigh seeing the 66 steps he needed to climb to the tomb’s entrance. He and Kochi started climbing, and his thoughts returned to Hokuto. Although he promised to step back, he still wanted Hokuto to have a good life. A talent like Hokuto is needed in the palace and the people, but maybe being a low-ranking official is better for him. Hokuto will be out of the prying eyes of those on top. No one will think he’s a threat. And his sister would have never fancied him once Hokuto’s presence became bigger.

“Maybe my sister made the right call after all.”

“I heard that this year’s top scorer will be our own steward at the Secretariat,” said Kochi.

“I see.” He wasn’t surprised at that one; it was Hokuto’s old position before he rose through the ranks. “Do you know the top scorer?”

Kochi frowned at him. “Didn’t you check the results?”

He did. But he only looked for Hokuto’s name. “I’m bad with names.”

“Except for the harem, you can literally recite everyone’s names and their family tree in the palace.”

He couldn’t deny that. “Just tell me who it is.”

“Tanaka Juri.”

He scrunched his face with distaste. The youngest son of the Tanaka clan was a famous skirt-chaser, and a patron of the red light district. 

“Do we really need a steward at the Secretariat–?” He paused, an eerie feeling enveloped him, and it wasn’t because he was near the tombs. 

“Kochi…” He called, but Kochi kept climbing.

“Your Highness, the earlier you start, the earlier we will finish.” 

“Kochi–!” Kochi finally turned and at the same time, armed men appeared at the top and at the bottom of the stairs, quickly subduing their carriage driver.

“Your Highness, if you come quietly, no one will get hurt.” 

Taiga swallowed hard, while Kochi still managed to complain, “This is why I insisted we travel with a full escort!” 

***

Hokuto knew he wouldn’t be able to sleep, but he was hoping for some peace and quiet. However, the man on his right was snoring, while the man on his left wasn’t only occupying 50% of the coach due to his size, his heaviness made the carriage lean to the right.

“I hope the horse can make it,” he thought, regretting his decision to decline his master’s offer to take his private carriage. He thought he was doing the common folk a favor, but here he was, suffering with his fellow commoners and not enjoying it.

He sighed and slightly opened the bamboo curtain; a half moon shone above them. His master is truly wise, because Hokuto wasn’t just disappointed in himself; he was devastated. But his disappointment didn’t stem much from being a low-ranking official; he is more upset by how the panelist showed him their difference in power. When he saw Taiga wasn’t one of the panelists, he prepared himself to be trampled, and even when he answered well, he knew the panel had made their decision before he even sat there. He felt the unfairness, the injustice, and he was naive to think fairness even exists. Taiga really gave him the edge back then, and even when Hokuto amassed power, a huge chunk of it still came from Taiga’s sphere of influence. 

“He had me killed so we’re even, but I wonder why he didn’t arrive. Is he okay?” His thoughts were interrupted when the coach came to a sudden halt, all three of them inside were pushed to the back, and Hokuto had to bear the weight of his fellow passengers.

The curtain parted and before he could even stifle a groan, a masked man announced, “This carriage and everyone here are now under the Ink Black Heart.”

***

Crack.

“Lord Wen? People just casually call themselves lord nowadays,” said Taiga. His captors stated that a certain Lord Wen would be seeing him shortly after they locked Kochi and him in a room filled with straws. 

Crack. 

“Could he be a provincial lord?” asked Kochi.  

Crack. 

Taiga shrugged. “Could be. Or he’s just that small and unpopular.” The Queen had him memorize names and faces of all the noble families in the capital and outside, but he couldn’t recall a “Lord Wen”.

Crack.

“I’m impressed, Your Highness, you’re handling this pretty well.” 

Crack. 

Taiga just smiled. He already died in a fire; a kidnapping doesn’t even hold a candle. 

Crack. 

“I’m also impressed you can still eat your sunflower seeds.” The straw is now littered with salted shells that Kochi hasn’t stopped eating, even en route to wherever they were brought. 

The cracking paused as Kochi rolled her eyes. “I was leaving a trail.” 

His jaw dropped. “That’s astounding.” 

“Don’t keep your hopes up, your personal guard is pretty thick.” 

He bit his lower lip. His personal guard is even younger than him, but he was personally recommended by the Head of the Imperial Guard, not because he has skills, but simply because he is his son.

“Why did we leave him behind again?” asked Taiga. 

“Because his daddy called him. Do you think he would arrive with, like, His Majesty’s army?”

Taiga almost laughed. “You overestimate His Majesty’s love for me.” Everyone knows he only became the Crown Prince to appease the Queen and her family. 

The door opened before Kochi finished all his sunflower seeds, and a portly man entered. Unlike the gruff men who took Kochi and him, the man in a maroon robe appeared meek and, surprisingly, ashamed.

“Your Highness, I am Situ Wen, but everyone calls me Lord Wen. I apologized for having to meet you this way,” said the man as he kowtowed to him. 

“You’d rather risk your and your men’s necks instead of officially requesting an audience with His Majesty or me?”

“We are desperate, Your Highness,” said Lord Wen, his face still looking at the floor. “It has been 3 months since the locusts swarmed our villages, yet we haven’t received any help from the palace. Our people are dying, Your Highness, and we’re prepared to sacrifice our lives if it means our family gets to eat.” 

“Do you really think your family will be spared over this?” He asked, not because he wanted to scare the man, but because it was the truth. He sighed and reached for a sunflower seed. He just returned to his 21-year-old body, and he couldn’t allow lives to be wasted again for him. 

“Get up. Which village are you talking about?” 

The man rose, his face all red and sweaty. “Daban, Your Highness.”

“Daban?!” He repeated, shocked. He knew about the locusts' swarm, and His Majesty had sent help promptly. The King even ordered the Imperial Granaries to send a quarter of His Majesty’s reserves to the province. 

“There must be some miscommunication,” he said, weighing his words carefully. He didn’t want to accuse anyone without evidence, especially since he would be pointing fingers at one of the most influential officials, the Grand Chancellor Wu. 

“Where are we right now?”

Lord Wen stuttered. “I can’t really say–”

“I’m only asking since you and your men have gone this far and kidnapped the crown prince, why not add stealing to your crimes?”

Lord Wen looked toward Kochi, hoping he’d be the voice of reason to Taiga’s mad suggestion. 

“Don’t look at me, I always follow him.”

“Really, always?” Taiga remarked sarcastically to Kochi before turning to Lord Wen, who had gone pale. 

“You won’t really be stealing, Lord Wen, you’ll just be taking what is rightfully given for the people of Daban.”

Lord Wen’s eyes grew big and teary. “You want us to attack the Imperial Granaries?”

“Of course not,” said Taiga, rising from his seat. “That would really have you all killed. My suggestion is closer to Daban, a Summer Mansion in Shen Hu.”

***

Hokuto had just transported three crates of reddish rocks, and he was wheezing. He staggered to the commissary, grateful for a meal he earned, and pitying himself for such a fate.

“I came back from death for this?!” He thought as he ate a suspicious-looking gray-colored soup.

It had been three days since his coach was seized by a group called Ink Black Heart. They were all sent to a mine where they had to carry rocks for a meal. The group promised that he would be released after 7 days, and Hokuto badly wanted to believe that, after all, they didn’t seize any of his belongings. But again, what does he know?

“They’ll probably bury me with my stuff,” he murmured, and the man next to him sighed as though he shared his opinion.

“It’s my 7th day tomorrow, if you no longer see me, it's true,” the man whispered.

Hokuto nodded. “I’ll watch out for you then.”

“We can’t be that guy who seems to be enjoying this.”

“No one will enjoy this,” said Hokuto, scoffing. 

“Yes, there is.” The man glanced back, Hokuto followed his line of vision, and he almost threw up the soup he had worked hard for.

“Why the fuck is he here?”

“Rumor has it he stayed longer than 7 days–willingly,” the man said, pointing at the only shirtless man among them, who was hauling 2 crates at the same time. While everyone looked dispirited and bleak, the man glowed from sweat as he shook his hair as though he was bathing in spring rather than murky waters.

“Also, he gets a whole chicken for his hard work.”

Hokuto was too stunned to say anything; his eyes remained peeled at Shintaro, the Second Prince.

“It's my last day today, I leave early in the morning tomorrow,” Hokuto told Shintaro as they had his last lunch at the mine pit. They’ve been working side-by-side for three days, but Hokuto couldn’t bring himself to pry. In his mind, Shintaro is a prince and must be treated with respect.

“Then, you can have this,” Shintaro snapped his chicken leg in two and placed it in Hokuto’s bowl.

“Thank you, you are most gracious,” he said, overjoyed to finally get meat after a week.

“Can I ask you something?” asked Shintaro. 

“Yes, you may.”

“I told you I haven’t even had my coming of age, so why do you use polite speech to me?”

The chicken leg hung in the air as he grappled for an excuse. “I never noticed,” he lied instead. He couldn’t tell the Second Prince that out of habit, he only knew how to talk to Shintaro as his superior.  

“Shinchan, I’m leaving tonight, let's toast!”

“Sure!”

Hokuto patted his chest. His heart would always jump when the Second Prince was casually called “Shinchan”. Hokuto always feared that heads would roll or something, as he never dared to address the royalty with their birth names. Taiga is, of course, an exception, and unlike Shintaro, Taiga would go with a totally different name and character when he mingled with the public. He goes by Shibuya, a happy-go-lucky spoiled young master, and Minato, a traveling disciple of Hidden Clouds Temple with hypnotizing zither skills.  

He watched Shintaro drink merrily with a couple of miners who had approached him. In the past, his interactions with Shintaro were very minimal. After all, Shintaro joined the army before he even had a coming-of-age celebration. Moreover, Taiga kept Shintaro at bay; their mothers were at odds, leading the princes to be awkward with one another. In Hokuto’s opinion, Shintaro is one of the few who really cared for Taiga.

“Can I ask you something as well?” Hokuto asked as soon as Shintaro returned to his seat.  

“Go ahead.”

“Why are you still here?” 

Shintaro raised his arm and curled his hard-earned biceps. “To strengthen my body. I need to be strong enough to join the army next year. After this, I’m moving to the quarry next town, heard they were building a dam.”

“I see.” He didn’t really see. Shintaro could use the Ministry of War facilities if he wanted to bulk up. 

Shintaro added, “I want to be strong…strong enough to protect my brother, but not too strong he would think I’m a threat.”

He smiled softly toward the younger prince. He chose his next words carefully, “I’m a middle child, so I’m confused. What made you think your brother would see you as a threat? Threat to what–inheritance?”

“Inheritance?” He repeated as though it only dawned on him that other families have different circumstances. “I guess you can put it that way. Our family has something that can only be bestowed upon one person.” 

“Ahhh, and that could only be for your brother? Don’t you have any plans for it?” 

Shintaro widened his eyes as though Hokuto said something treacherous, which he probably did, except that Shintaro had no idea Hokuto was indeed referring to the imperial succession. 

“My only plan is to be of use to my brother,” he said firmly. “And if one day he says he doesn’t want it then, I’ll take the weight off his shoulders." 

Hokuto fought the threat of tears as he complained about the eternal dust in the mine while he rubbed his eyes. He wished Taiga could hear his brother; maybe he would feel less alone. 

Shintao scoffed. “I talk big as if my brother would ever ask that.” 

“You never know…”

“Nah, my brother is filial. He was brought up to value duty above all–even if it kills him.” 

Hokuto’s eyes started to sting once again, but before he could blame his emotions, alarm bells rang inside the mine, followed by a shout, “Dust storm! Dust storm! Everyone, take cover!” 

Hokuto didn’t have to ask as he followed everyone to the nearest cover. 

***

“Do you still see anyone?” 

Taiga widened his eyes until it hurt. His plan to storm Wu's mansion had been a success, but the chase had been brutal. Even though the Shady Forest could provide cover, Kochi preferred the cliff pass so they could see the runners after them clearly. The Wu clan had some serious runners who moved faster than horses. 

“I don’t see anyone,” he said. “Do you think we can slow down a bit?” 

“No, we need to ride fast until we reach the next town. I told you to take a few of Lord Wen’s men with us!” 

“And implicate ourselves?!” He said, incredulous. If he and Kochi were caught and his identity were revealed, it would be easier to feign ignorance of everything without proof. 

“I’m done changing, you go next.” He’d been wearing the black uniform that Lord Wen’s men were also wearing. He let the black garment fly like leaves before he took the reins from Kochi. 

“Stay fast, Your Highness,” Kochi instructed before he went in the carriage. 

“I will, yah!” As this was his second life, he fairly had an idea where they were. Steep valleys with turquoise rivers below, they were definitely in the Veil of Sorrow. A harrowing name for such a magnificent place. Legend has it that the gorge was formed because a man cut the mountain so he could bring his wife to the famous Shengmu Jing Temple, known for hot springs that could heal any ailment. However, his wife died before he could finish slicing the mountain. 

“A load of bullcrap,” he scoffed. “Cut the mountain, my ass.”

“Something is behind us!” Kochi threw his clothes away and took over. 

“They’ve caught up?!” 

“Worst! We might need to go back to the forest for shade.”

Taiga ran back in the carriage as Kochi started to swerve. He stared dumbstruck at the massive wall of gray clouds approaching them. He’d never seen anything like it, and when he touched his face, there were specks of black dust.

“What the–?!” The wind picked-up speed, he grabbed anything he could hold as opening his eyes became hard, while a violent wooshing sound played in his ears. 

“Kochi?! Kochi!” He screamed. He could feel his grasp loosening, his feet no longer standing on something solid, until a plop!

He opened his eyes, cold turquoise waters surrounded him, and he gasped for air, but pain seared through his chest as the water dragged him deeper. 

***

“I’ve heard of whirlwinds, but never that massive?” 

“I thought I was a goner earlier, my wife would never know where I was.” 

Hokuto listened to the conversations around the coach. Instead of waiting before sunrise, the four of them, jokingly called “graduates” from the mine pit, chose to depart at dusk for fear of another dust storm. Even the Second Prince ended his stint at the mine, but took the opposite direction from them for the quarry site. 

“It’s the gods,” said the monk as he rotated the prayer beads in his hand. “The gods are angry that they were destroying nature, so they sent the dust storm.”

Hokuto held his tongue, choosing not to argue with a monk. He knew from the get-go that the mine pit disturbed the ground, and all those loose particles were picked up by high winds that created a haboob. 

A rapt from the coach door disrupted his thoughts. He quickly went on a defensive stance, fearing another group of bandits on another mission to find temporary slaves. But it was just their hired driver who said, “The horse needs rest, we’ll camp here tonight, and we’ll leave when the Big Dipper is in the southwest.” 

Hokuto walked to the body of water for a drink, running his palm through the shallow water, and seeing specks of black sand. “Guess this place wasn’t safe from the dust storm.” He gave up on drinking, and when one of his fellow mine-pit graduates used his fire folder, he glimpsed someone from the opposite bank. 

“Uhm, excuse me, can you shine the light toward this side?” 

The man waved his fire folder and Hokuto saw it again, something glossy in the shade of emerald. “I think someone is in the other bank.” 

“Do you think he got swept away by the dust storm?” 

Hokuto borrowed the fire folder and ran towards the opposite bank. The water was shallow in the area, but it was freezing even though it was summer. He reached the other bank, and his eyes widened seeing an emerald robe painted in dragon scales. Only the descendants of the royal family can wear fabrics with dragon scales. 

“A nobleman in this area?” He felt for the man’s pulse, his skin was cold and he couldn’t feel any pulse. 

“My lord?” He turned the man over and despite the drumming of his heart, he thought he stopped breathing, seeing a familiar face that used to appear in his dreams.

“Your High–” He sank on his knees and did something he learned in his past life–chest compressions to get the heart beating again. 

“Oi, what are you doing to him? You’re killing him!” One of his companions complained as they reached the riverside. 

“I’m saving him,” he snapped back. Giving Taiga two rescue breaths. Taiga’s lips were cold as ice, cold as dead. 

“You can’t die, not yet, I haven’t gotten back to you for having me killed, you idiot!” His thoughts ran wild and his compressions became shallow. Seven days at the mine pit, and his muscles were still sore.

“Stop it, I think you’re hurting him!” 

Hokuto didn’t stop. “Wake up!” 

One of them tried to pull him away, but Hokuto persisted. “Wake up!”

“Stop it!” 

“Wake up!”

“Stop, help us here!” 

“Wake up! Wake up! Taiga!!!” 

***

“Taiga!”

Taiga opened his eyes and gasped for air. He braced himself for pain, but while his chest felt tender, he felt better to be inhaling air again. He could see the Big Dipper in the sky, while fire crackled nearby. 

“Kochi…” he called as he tried to get up. “Koch–” He paused as a huge man with prayer beads in his hand stared down at him.

“The gods clearly favored you.”

“Are you my saviour?” He asked when he realized he wasn’t even wearing his own clothes. He smelled something familiar and pressed the sleeve on his nose. “Sandalwood and lily…Hokuto’s favorite incense–”

“Your saviour is grilling fish, oh, here he is.” 

Taiga didn’t dare to look for his heart already knew as it pounded on his chest. And when the voice spoke, Taiga thought he would cry. 

“Care for some fish, young master?” 

He clenched his hand on the clothes as he tried to pacify his heart. Maintaining one’s composure has been ingrained in him since he was a kid, but those etiquette lessons didn’t include how to keep cool when you met your lover from a past life. 

“Young master?”

“You overestimate me,” he said, “I’m no young master, just a traveling merchant.” He braved to look up as Hokuto knelt beside him. Hokuto as a twenty years old; his handsome features were yet to be sharpened; a slumbering jade waiting to be discovered. 

“You wore such fine garments,” said Hokuto, pointing to Taiga’s emerald robes with dragon scales splayed on the rocks. “That’s why I assume.”

“Those were fish scales, not dragons,” he said quickly, as though commoners would dare to use dragon scales.  

Hokuto smiled as though Taiga told a funny joke. “I’m Hokuto, by the way, and over there is Liuyang.” 

The man with prayer beads simply nodded and excused himself to catch some sleep. 

“You should eat,” Hokuto said before he gently blew on the charred fish. “You’ve been in the water for so long, you must be hungry.” 

“Thank you, I’m really grateful for this.” Hokuto passed the fish, their fingers brushing lightly.

“It’s hot.”

Taiga simply nodded and took a bite of the fish. “It’s good,” he said.  

“I know it’s not,” said Hokuto. “We don’t have salt, but it’s enough to fill you.” 

“Thank you again,” he said, trying his very best to focus all his attention on the fish, but Hokuto seated next to him made him all flustered. Hokuto would be pleased to know he has the power to leave Taiga unsettled. Taiga was just a pro at hiding it.

“Taiga!”

Taiga mentally shook his head. It must be his imagination that someone called him “Taiga”, Hokuto couldn’t have known who he was. And why was Hokuto even in the area? 

“Are you traveling somewhere?” Taiga asked and at the same time, Hokuto also asked, “Why were you on the riverbank?” 

They both laugh, but the awkwardness is stronger. 

“You found me on the riverbank?” He clarified and Hokuto nodded. “My friend and I were traveling, the wind got too strong, and I felt like I was being thrown by the wind.” 

“Ahhh, you were also caught by the dust storm.” 

“Dust storm? Those gray clouds with strong winds were a dust storm?” 

Hokuto nodded. “My buddies and I were in the mine pit when it happened.”

“Mine pit?” He asked, stunned. 

“Yes, we worked there for a week. We’re on our way back home.”

Taiga had no words. He knew Hokuto got low scores in his Civil Service Exam because of those nobility snobs, but a scholar like Hokuto in a mine pit sounded as crazy as the Legend of the Veil of Sorrow. Is Hokuto giving up on becoming a court official after a massive downgrade in his grades compared to his past life? And why is there even a mine pit nearby? 

“Where is this mine pit, and what do you mine there?” 

“I’m not really sure, but we passed by Shen Fu earlier, so maybe at the border? As for what we mine, I’m not an expert on stones, but it's reddish with a faint smell of blood.” 

“Iron,” Taiga guessed. Iron mining and stock-piling of grains that should be for Daban. Someone was clearly stocking up their resources, and he doubted it was just for the rainy day. 

“So you’re heading back to Jinnian?” He asked to change the topic until he realized his biggest mistake. 

“How do you know I’m going to Jinnian?” 

“Idiot. Idiot. Think, Taiga, think!” 

“The man with prayer beads told me,” he lied, hoping Hokuto would never ask the monk.

“Ah, yes, we’re heading back there. How about you?” 

He thought of Kochi. His Chief of Household is definitely looking for him. 

“My friend will find me,” he said with confidence. “He’s good with maps and stuff, I’m sure he has figured out where the wind and river could have taken me.” 

“I see. We will leave at the break of dawn, will you be fine on your own?” 

“I’ll be okay,” he said with a smile. His eyes grew warm as a memory kept replaying that he heeded that inner voice.

“But why can’t I just run away with you?” 

***

Hokuto only managed to maintain a straight face by crushing pebbles in his left hand. The pain kept him sane, or he might have hurled words toward Taiga. But what good would that do? The Crown Prince, next to him had no memory of that night before he left for Zhao. 

“You joked as though we’re star-crossed lovers,” said Hokuto and faking a laugh. 

Taiga giggled. “Sorry, I don’t know why it came out like that, but I was going to say, why don’t you go with my friend and me? I want to reward you.”

“Thank you, but I have no need for rewards,” he said as he digested his conversation with Taiga. The “friend” Taiga mentioned would surely be Taiga’s Chief of Household, Kochi. He could only wonder why it was only the two of them; they usually travel with a minimum of four guards, including Taiga’s personal guard. And why were they in the Shen Fu and Daban area? 

“I insist.”

“Then, perhaps your name.” He wondered which of Taiga’s fake names he would use. 

“Taiga. My name is Taiga.” 

Hokuto’s hand dug deeper into the pebbled sand. He never expected Taiga to give him his real name. In the past, Hokuto always considered it a privilege to address Taiga so intimately. But now that he was just some man who was passing by, he felt, oddly, loved.

He mentally chided himself. Taiga clearly felt indebted to him for saving his life. That was it. No love, just genuine appreciation.

“You have a nice name,” he commented as he couldn’t bring himself to repeat it. He feared there would be tears. 

“So are you,” said Taiga as he looked up at the sky, “I’ll never forget your name.”

Hokuto looked up as well, “Me, too.” The Big Dipper is almost at the southwest and the summer sun is breaking. 

Silence stretched between them. Taiga seemed to be in deep thoughts, while Hokuto missed moments like this where they would just be sitting and chilling, minding their own business, yet when one leaves, the other will pull. 

Hokuto didn’t know what kind of joke the heavens were trying to pull as Taiga and he met this way again, but he was sure of one thing: he still had feelings for the man who ordered his head. 

“I’m really destined to die.” He buried his head on his knees. Should he just surrender to fate?

“I can hear hoofbeats; that must be my friend,” said Taiga. 

Hokuto looked up; his companions were rising too, while he could see the outline of a man on a horseback.

“Kochi!” Taiga yelled while he waved. 

The man on a horse became clearer and Hokuto found himself smiling at the youthful face of Kochi Yugo, an outstanding man in Hokuto’s opinion.

Kochi got down from the horse and crossed the distance between him and Taiga.

“As long as you’re alive,” said Kochi before kowtowing toward Hokuto. “Thank you for saving my master!” 

Taiga laughed. “He’s kidding, I’m no master,  we’re friends.”

The sun rose steadily, and Taiga was back in his emerald robes, while Hokuto clutched the clothes that Taiga wore. It still felt warm, almost as though he was hugging Taiga.

“We part here,” said Taiga.

“Take care, may you reach your destination safely,” he said. 

“I know you said you don’t care for any rewards, but for my peace of mind, let me give this to you.” Taiga spread out his hand and Hokuto saw Taiga’s jade-carved bamboo whistle. 

“I hope that day will never come, but if you find yourself in trouble, blow this and a hawk will arrive. Tie this on the hawk’s legs and I will find you.” 

Hokuto didn’t want to accept it; the whistle was given to Taiga for his own protection, but Taiga took his hand and forced the whistle to him. 

“Keep it.” 

All he could do was nod. They bowed. Taiga climbed behind Kochi, while Hokuto entered the coach. They started moving, and as they gained speed, Hokuto took another peek outside. Taiga and Kochi were ahead of them, and Taiga’s emerald robes fluttered like a dragon flying away.

“Then and now, I’ve always been behind you. We can never be equal unless…” He shook his head at his maddening thought. Maybe the heavens let them meet again not to correct the past, but to let go of whatever was holding them from the past. 

The Mid-Autumn Festival is fast approaching, and the busy downtown of Jinnian has been bustling with activity. Hokuto is particularly busy; his parents’ shop has been making 6 styles of lanterns that are always sold out on the day of the festival. They had opened reservations that morning and they needed more materials to keep up with the demand. That was just for the lanterns; they had to close their mooncakes reservations as their supplier from the Capital couldn’t keep up. 

“Young master, we have reached the manor.” 

He fixed his robe as he entered their courtyard. The air smells crisp and the chill makes his mood bearable. It had been 3 months since he passed the Civil Service Exam, and until now he hadn’t received a job order. He was about to enter the main hall when he heard shouting.

“1000 taels, are you out of your mind?” Shouted his mother. 

“Mother…” Hokuto recognized the voice as his youngest brother's. “You took the same amount to help Hokuto prepare for the exam and financed his stay at the Capital. But what good did it do? He can’t even enter the Crystal Court! He’s useless–!” 

“How dare you?!” 

Hokuto stepped back as he heard the unmistakable sound of his mother’s palm hitting his brother’s face. He was tired and weary, but maybe he should take his dinner somewhere else. 

“Don’t tell mother and father that I’ve arrived,” he instructed the servant as he stepped back to the streets of Jinnian.

“My brother isn’t wrong,” he thought as he walked toward Gifu, a popular restaurant. It hurts to be called a loser, but he couldn’t really oppose it. 

He sighed and watched the street bathe in the amber glow of lanterns. The downtown is still lively at this hour, some shops remain open, while the Padme Bridge is filled with couples in courtship or tryst. He should have been content in their small town; why did he ever set his sights on the Capital? 

“Young Master Hokuto, I thought you'd gone home?”

He smiled at Mr. Lowe, owner of Gifu. “Table for one, please.” 

“This way,” Mr. Lowe led him to the corner table that gave him a view of the ongoing pipa player in the middle. 

“Allow me to treat you to our newest batch of peach blossom wine.” 

Hokuto didn’t really want to drink, but self-loathing wouldn't be complete without downing a jar of wine. 

“Thank you, Mr. Lowe.” They toast and although the wine tasted like flowers initially, his throat burned afterward. 

“I’ll leave you now, Young Master.”

He bid the proprietor goodbye and busied himself getting drunk. After all, he’d better live up to his loser reputation. 

The pipa player ended and when the next performer arrived, most customers left their seats to get closer to the podium. He took a closer look at the man in white robes. He wasn’t even that good-looking, but almost everyone in the restaurant looked enamored.

“Here’s your order, braised beef–”

“Who is he?” He asked the server, tilting his head toward the stage.

“He prefers to be called The Great Seer.”

“He tells fortunes?”

The server shook her head. “More like court gossip.”

Hokuto scoffed. “He who goes about as a tale-bearer reveals secrets; therefore, don’t keep company with him who opens wide his lips. ” He muttered to no one. He ignored the clamor by the stage and concentrated on filling his stomach.

“Good evening, people of Jinnian!” The room clapped, and Hokuto rolled his eyes. The man’s voice was mousy, reminding Hokuto of that sneaky eunuch in Taiga’s palace.

“Hot tea from the capital and our beautiful White Tiger might soon be a groom!”

 Hokuto sprayed wine all over his meal, which was followed by fits of coughing. 

“I’m just jesting,” the so-called Great Seer said, “The ladies really grew quiet over that.”

Hokuto wiped his mouth as he stepped closer to the stage. The common folk preferred using nicknames given to various members of the royal family. “White Tiger” was given to Taiga after his aunt, the current Queen of Wuan Country near the Bastion of Gods Mountain Ridge, gifted him a white tiger when Taiga turned one year old. 

“About our White Tiger, all of us knew his other nickname, right?” 

“Toothless Tiger,” jeered the majority of men in the audience. 

“The disrespect!” Hokuto screamed in his head.

“Well, well, well, the Toothless Tiger started showing his fangs, rawr! He picked up a fight with none other than the Grand Chancellor!”

Hokuto started biting a nail. Was this his fault? He casually told Taiga about the mine pit for him to investigate and be prepared for a worst-case scenario. Hokuto knew the mine pit was illegal, and mining iron ore could only mean two things: mining for profit and mining to make weapons. He trusted Taiga not to be reckless, but he guessed he judged Taiga wrongly. His memory of Taiga as 21 years old was timid in the Crystal Court. Taiga would never sow discord; he used to tell Hokuto that “balance” is the key to power in the court.

“...he accused some old tigers of withholding grains meant for the people...” 

Hokuto raised an eyebrow, recalling that Taiga and Kochi’s travel might not be innocent at all. 

“...battle of words ensues and in the end, the Jade Emperor favored the old tiger…”

A collective sigh of disappointment could be heard, Hokuto included. His Majesty didn’t favor Taiga, while Her Majesty only saw Taiga as a king-candidate she needed to lift. 

“...the Jade Emperor offered the White Tiger; marry the old tiger’s daughter as an apology for his mistake, or face exile to Jizhou.” 

The crowd gasped. Jizhou just had a major volcanic eruption, and as the news says, it has become a wasteland. 

“The White Tiger chose…Jizhou!”

“Ehhhhh!” The crowd erupted in disbelief.  

“Does this mean the White Tiger is no longer the crown prince?” Someone asked and everyone started giving their opinions. 

The shot glass crashed on Hokuto’s palm, and blood dripped on his clothes, while the crowd around him argued. 

The past is being reshaped to something unfamiliar, and he thinks it's time for him to go back to the Capital. 

***

The art of kneeling was never about endurance, but more about pride, and even though Taiga could no longer feel his lower legs, his back remained upright while he knelt on a washing board with ridges. 

He kept his eyes peeled on the entrance of his mother’s palace; the lanterns had just been lit when he saw his mother’s lady-in-waiting, Lady Fuyou. 

“You may see Her Majesty, Your Highness.” 

Taiga sighed while his steward helped him. His legs felt like metal, and his steward was literally dragging him. 

“Has Kochi packed?” He asked while he limped. 

“Yes, Your Highness. Your new personal guard also awaits your instructions.” 

Taiga just nodded. He reached his mother’s receiving area and her steward helped him to kneel again. But at least, he was now kneeling on a cushion. 

“Greetings, Your Majesty,” he said, steadying his breath. 

“Rise.”

He braved a look at the queen. People say that the Queen and he were the spitting image; both beautiful and regal. 

“Have you reflected on your mistakes?” The Queen asked, her voice calm but sharp.

Taiga bowed. “I regretted them dearly, and I apologized for my recklessness.” 

“I told you ever since you can understand, I will make sure you’ll safely ascend the throne. Just follow me and it’ll be yours. How hard is that? Why do you have to do that to the Wus? Didn’t you think that your father was just waiting for an opening to banish you somewhere?” 

Taiga smiled bitterly. His mother wanted him to become king despite the danger, while his father didn’t want him to be king despite declaring him heir apparent. What an unconventional family he has! 

“Keep a low profile during your exile,” she instructed. “Your father wins this round, but I’ll make sure to have you back in 2 years. Until then, stay out of trouble. Do you hear me?” 

“Yes, Your Majesty.” 

“If there’s nothing else, you may leave.” 

“There is something else, Your Majesty.”

“What is it?”

He looked up with fervor. “I’m going to be the king, but please, please trust me to make decisions on my own.”

His mother’s brow furrowed as she threw a teacup on the floor. “Are you saying the decisions I make for you are wrong?” 

“Please don’t misunderstand, Your Majesty,” he said quickly. Her mother’s maids joined him in kowtowing as they trembled at the side. 

“I just wish to share your burden,” said Taiga. “But most of all, I don’t want anyone to harm you.” 

His mother looked suspiciously at him while he counted the years. Five years from now, while everyone was in the middle of the Mid-Autumn Festival celebrations, an insurrection would happen and would claim the Queen’s life.

His mother will never see him become the king. 

“No one can harm me,” said his mother, smiling as though she heard a joke. “And if anyone dares, my soul shall never rest until you become the king.”

Taiga sighed and bowed. “I understand. Take care of yourself while I’m away, Your Majesty.” 

His steward helped him again. His mother had resumed reading, and she didn’t even spare him a glance as he left hobbling. His mother wanted him to be the king, and over time, his mother’s dreams became his dream, too. 

He looked up at the sky as he boarded his carriage. The moon looked bigger and brighter. 

“The past has really started changing, and I wonder if the moon has stayed the same.”

***

“You’re taking this extremely well.”

Taiga just smiled at Kochi’s compliment while he busied himself studying the map. “I don’t have time to sulk,” he said. After all, he was no longer the same 21-year-old who lamented the lack of affection from both of his parents. 

“That’s very mature of you. And why the detour?” asked Kochi. “We could have waited for the caravan that would be traveling in 2 days.”

Taiga might have been exiled, but he was also ordered to rebuild Jizhou. Thus, he would be traveling with a team that could help him, but he chose to travel a day earlier. 

“One of my many regrets is that I didn’t get to travel much. I should have seen more of the world.”

“Many regrets? How old are you?” 

He just shrugged and put down the map. He took a peek at the scope he got from the Imperial Observatory, and saw that autumn foliage had started changing the mountains. He couldn’t find what resembled a mine pit. 

“Anyway, remember when you were given a list of officials who would be traveling with us to Jizhou? I saw a familiar name recommended by the Ministry of Works, someone called Matsumura Hokuto.” 

He returned the scope to his pocket. Hokuto’s name still has the same effect on him. “What about it?”

“Is that the same guy who got perfect marks but failed the interview, and the same guy who saved you at the gorge?” 

He shrugged once more. “Maybe.” 

“But why change him?” 

“He’s new, what would he know about building roads?”

Kochi nodded in agreement. “You have a point.”

He smiled. There was no way he would bring Hokuto to such a desolate place. Hokuto’s talents are better needed at the Capital.

“This Matsumura is indeed young and inexperienced. Is that why you’re helping him land a position by asking favors?”

He hoped he remained poker-faced. If Kochi knew, everyone knew. Gossip in the palace spread faster than wildfire. 

“As you’ve said, he could be my saviour, should I not help him?” 

“Your Highness,” said Kochi, his expression stern. “As long as you’re the Crown Prince, people close to you will be in danger, a young man like Matsumura Hokuto will not be able to protect himself. Can you protect him?”

Taiga felt his throat tighten. Kochi’s words were reminiscent of when he found out Hokuto, and he was in a relationship. 

“Can you protect him?”

“And I failed,” he murmured.

“What were you saying, Your Highness?”

Taiga mentally slapped his face. “You’re overthinking this, Kochi. As you’ve also mentioned, Hokuto is young and inexperienced; no one will think of him as a threat. And don’t worry, I’m now in exile, what can I do for him?” 

“Reporting, Your Highness.”

He and Kochi turned to Taiga’s newest personal guard, Jesse Lewis, tall and lean with blond hair. His mother is a local but his dad hailed from the West, and thus, his unique features. Taiga chose him because his mother is a Jizhou local, and his father has no affiliation with either the King or Queen. 

“What is it, Jesse?” 

“We have located something resembling a mine pit a hundred meters from here. It was between Rinoa Valley.” 

Taiga felt his blood jump with excitement, but Jesse’s next words put a halt to it. 

“However, the mine pit has been abandoned; it seems like they exploded the entire area before leaving it.”

“Looks like you really scared them, so they started covering their tracks,” commented Kochi. 

“Ask the nearby town if they heard explosions,” Taiga ordered. 

“Yes, Your Highness.” 

Jesse ran along with two more guards, while Kochi and he locked their eyes. 

“You’re right, Your Highness, before I worry about this Hokuto, I should worry first for you. I never thought you to be this bold. You’re really set on running after Minister Wu and his family.” 

Taiga smirked. “You’re also right, Kochi, people close to me will always be in danger, so I have to be bold if I want to protect any of you. Jizhou is the southernmost province of the Great Ying. We will transform it so that eventually, our achievements will be echoed throughout the kingdom.”

Kochi looked suspiciously at him, but nonetheless, he said, “I’m not sure what happened, Your Highness, but as long as you remain a good Crown Prince, I’ll follow you.”

***

“Greetings, Master Pei!” 

“I didn’t expect to see you here until after the Mid-Autumn Festival. What brings you here?”

Hokuto straightened his back. “You wound me, Master, I thought you'd be happy to see me. Look–!” He opened the chests he brought with him. “The finest ginseng to help with your joints.” 

“Those are expensive.”

“Our shop could afford it.” 

“Then, thank you.” Master Pei opened the bottle of ginseng for a sniff before he made a sigh of satisfaction. “This is premium.”

“Of course, Master, that’s what you deserve.”

Master Pei gestured for Hokuto to take a seat across from him. “I haven’t received any official posting for you, so I’m sure that’s not what you are here for. Tell me, how can I help you?”

Hokuto cleared his throat. “There’s really nothing, Master. I only came here to fetch some goods for the festival and to greet you.”

Master Pei just looked at him intently while he stroked his beard. “I see. I thought you were here to ask me about the rumors.” 

He tried to act dumb. “Rumors? You mean, about the Crown Prince’s exile?” 

“That’s not a rumor. The Crown Prince was indeed exiled, but I’m pretty sure the Queen wouldn’t let it last; she would surely be pleading and rallying her factions to have her son returned after a year or two.”

“Oh.” His heart slowed from racing, pleased to know that Taiga wouldn’t be exiled forever. 

“Speaking of the Crown Prince, have you met him?” asked Master Pei as he refilled his teacup. 

Hokuto took a sip of his own tea while he thought of a safe reply. In this lifetime, he only met Taiga once at the Veil of Sorrow, and he should have no idea he is the prince. 

“No, he wasn’t at the panel interview. Why do you ask, Master?”

“I lied when I said I haven’t received an official posting for you.”

He frowned. “I’m no longer jobless?”

“You still are, unfortunately. You should have been part of the delegates to help rebuild Jizhou.” 

“Jizhou? That’s where His Highness was sent, right?” 

Master Pei nodded. “Yes, and I don’t know if His Highness has any say in this matter, but your name was removed from the list.” 

“Oh…” His mood deflated, and even Taiga shunned him. His younger brother is right, he is a loser. 

“But I don’t think the Crown Prince did it, because why would he be asking favors for you?” 

His heart raced again. “His Highness was asking favors for me?” 

“So I heard. The Vice Minister of the Ministry of Rites visited me to ask if you were really my student, because His Highness was asking him to take you in. If you’ve never met him, why would he do that for you?”

Could Taiga learn of his identity after he saved him at the Veil of Sorrow? That could be the only reason. Taiga shouldn’t be doing him any favors for the same reason he did in the past. 

“I’m as clueless as you are, master,” he said matter-of-factly. 

“The Crown Prince is known for taking in people who are talented and without noble backgrounds. Maybe that’s the reason he has taken a liking to you. But don’t worry, if I receive any from His Highness or Her Majesty’s faction, I’ll reject them on your behalf.” 

Hokuto knew his master chose to be neutral, but he never really knew he was such an anti. “You don’t want me to work for His Highness?”

“His Highness is filial; an admirable trait, but also his weakness. He’s too weak to go against Her Majesty, much less instigate His Majesty. I admit his recent squabble was commendable, but not strategic enough, so he got exiled. Simply put, the likes of you will be caught up in the storm, and His Highness won’t be able to protect you.”

He clenched his hand to a fist; he wanted to argue that Taiga did try to protect him, but he still ended up dead, so it was all meaningless. He wished he had his master’s insight in the past, and maybe he received it now so the past won’t be repeated. He didn’t become the top scorer in the exam, Taiga got exiled, and they have only met once. They were basically two travelers who met at the rest stop en route to different destinations. They were destined to meet and separate. 

“The heavens granted me this second life to live well…so why…why am I still hesitating?”

“Is everything okay, Hokuto? You’re spacing out.”

He looked up and wished he could smile and let go. The Taiga now had no idea of their past; that they fell in love and he ordered Hokuto’s kill. Why is he trying to hold on to something that hasn’t existed?  

“Hokuto?”

“Master, how can I let go of this regret? You told me before that I have to slice through the mountain to change the course of the river.”

Master Pei looked oddly at him, but he nodded nonetheless. 

“That mountain is the Crown Prince, only by cutting him will everything change.”

2 years later, Year 564 AD – Year of the Wood Dog

“Receive His Majesty’s decree…”

Everyone in the reception hall of “Tiger’s Den” knelt. 

The eunuch continued, “The Crown Prince is filial and virtuous. He had shown great resilience while maintaining grace and dignity as he helped Jizhou rise from the ashes. Thus, I’m granting him the honorary title, the Venerated Phoenix, for his contributions to the Great Ying. I also ordered the Crown Prince to return to the Capital.”

“We humbly receive, all hail, His Majesty!”

Taiga received the golden scroll. The scroll was light, but the content was heavy. He passed the scroll to his attendant, who congratulated him, while he tasked his maid to accompany the eunuch to their rooms for the night. 

“Congratulations, Your Highness, you’re finally going back to the Capital,” said Kochi once their visitors were out of earshot. “Happy?” 

“Excited,” he said without much enthusiasm. He did want to return to the Capital, but he hadn’t found a suitable replacement to oversee the projects he started. Just a few days ago, a plant finally sprouted amidst the ash.  

“I could stay for another year.”

Taiga gasped and stared wide-eyed at Kochi. Taiga did toy with the idea of entrusting Jizhou to Kochi for a while. 

“Or until His Majesty has found a new replacement. Or maybe you can find someone suitable in the Capital and recommend them to His Majesty?” Kochi suggested and added in a more amusing tone, “Why? Are you worried your palace will burn without me?” 

“I need you,” Taiga admitted, which made Kochi raise an eyebrow. “But there’s no one I can trust more than you to look after Jizhou.” 

“Then, that settles it, Your Highness.”

“Should I also leave Jesse here?”

Kochi scoffed. “No, please. He hasn’t really lived in Red Hill Palace, so make sure he memorized every nook and cranny of the palace. I’ll quiz him when I return.”

“He’ll be sad,” teased Taiga.

“And I’ll be at peace.” 

Taiga grinned. Jesse didn’t exist in the past, and having someone clingy and loyal to him and Kochi was an uncanny addition to his changing past. Moreover, it was nice that between him and Kochi, someone’s spring was about to blossom even though that someone was in denial.

“Reporting Your Highness, Captain Rui of His Majesty’s Bronze Vanguard wishes an audience with you.”

He and Kochi exchanged worried looks. “Let him in,” Taiga told Jesse.

A man in bronze and azure livery entered the room. He matched Jesse’s stature, but unlike Jesse’s youthful features, Captain Rui’s face had been hardened by battle.

“Your Highness.”

“At ease, Captain. How may I help you?”

He withdrew a scroll from his back and spread it on the table. 

“We might need to deviate from our original route back to the capital, Your Highness.” 

“Why is that?”

Captain Rui encircled Vennesse using his finger. Vennesse is a border town between the Great Plains and the Great Ying. The town used to be under the rule of the Khan Tribe, but since their leader’s death, both countries are now trying to claim it, and war is just around the corner.

“In case His Highness isn’t aware–”

“I am aware,” said Taiga, sighing. His present must have changed, but some things remained the same. His Majesty had time to claim another land when Jizhou hadn't gotten back from the dead. 

“So I guess we’ll traverse the mountains?” He guessed.

“Yes, Your Highness. It’s autumn, the weather is fine and unlikely to rain. We can also stop here to rest and assess,” Captain Rui said, circling Balmoral Garrison. 

“Won’t the soldiers in Balmoral be busy with the impending war?”

“No, Your Highness, that will be the main job of those in Fort Caserta,” he said, circling the diamond-shaped land near the port town across Vennesse. “It’s a new camp established only a year ago.”

“I see.” It seemed like His Majesty had been planning to take Vennesse since last year. In the past, his father failed to take Vennesse. The war lasted for three years, hundreds of lives were lost, and His Majesty concluded that to alleviate the people’s suffering, Taiga must get married, so the mourning will change to a celebration.

“If I were more privy to military matters back then, I would know what to do to win the war and avoid that damn marriage.”

He heard Kochi clear his throat. A habit Kochi developed when Taiga found himself wandering to his past regrets.

He smiled at the captain. “Very well, Captain Rui, my life is in your hands.”

“Fear not, Your Highness, I will safely escort you back to the Capital.”

***

Snorers had unconsciously started competing with each other and Hokuto is still not asleep. He craned his neck to the opposite futon and Shintaro’s spot remained empty. 

“Is he still with the Commandant? Was his cover blown?” 

Shintaro was called during dinner to the Commandant’s tent, and he hasn’t returned since. Hokuto didn’t know when it started, but since he joined the army and learned the Second Prince was in the same garrison, he took it upon himself to be literally Shintaro’s nanny. He slipped out of their tent; the garrison was on high alert following His Majesty’s declaration of war with The Great Plains for Vennesse, and there were more patrols tonight than usual. 

“Kripke!” He called, recognizing one of the patrols. 

“You should be sleeping, Matsumura.”

“Shintaro is still not back. Is he still in the Commandant’s tent?” 

“The Commandant has retired to his quarters, but maybe you can check the Mess Hall.”

“Thank you.” He ran toward the Mess Hall when he overheard someone say, “Your Highness”. He paused along the white tents in the middle. These tents were set-up as temporary barracks and for injured soldiers. 

“Your Highness?” He strained to listen. It was either Shintaro’s cover was blown, or someone known to him is visiting. 

There was some rustling inside the tent when another voice spoke, “This is fine. It’s only for a night, and we leave at the crack of dawn.”

Hokuto felt his heart jump as he took a step back. He knew that voice. 

The familiar voice spoke again, “Yui, go check if the others have been settled.”

“I’ll just change the sheets, Your Highness, the Commandant of this garrison is so disrespectful. He didn’t even welcome you before retiring for the night. And look at this tent, some sheets even have blood stains!” The man named Yui complained. 

“Let it go,” said Taiga, his tone unbothered. “We lived in the same tent during our first few months in Jizhou, this is nothing.” 

“But Your Highness–”

A violent coughing disrupted Yui’s objection, and Hokuto found himself stepping closer to the tent, itching for a peek. 

“Your Highness, I’ll brew your medicine immediately!” 

Hokuto’s eyes widened. “Is Taiga sick?” He stepped back into the shadows as the tent curtain parted, and the steward hurried toward the infirmary. Taiga had another fit of coughing and Hokuto’s knuckles turned white from holding the tent.

“What are you doing here?” 

He pushed Shintaro away and gestured to him to lower his voice. “I–I was looking for you,” he said when he noticed the tray Shintaro was holding.

“I didn’t finish dinner earlier, so I grabbed some snacks from the hall, and I was asked to deliver this to our visitor. Do you know who the visitor is?”

“Well–” He glanced at the food to be served to Taiga, a soulless porridge and scraps of lentils; a clear sign that their Commandant didn’t favor the Crown Prince. 

“Can you go back to the hall and ask the cook for some mutton we had earlier? Also, those pine mushrooms and osmanthus cake. Tell him it’s for you.”

Shintaro scowled. Hokuto was about to make another lie when Shintaro spoke, “If you’re hungry, just say so.”

Shintaro was gone in a flash and inside the tent, Taiga had another fussy cough followed by sounds of falling, which Hokuto rushed inside before he could stop himself.

“I’m fine, just place the medicine there and go check on the others,” said Taiga without glancing back. Hokuto watched Taiga pick up a small mahogany chest and a couple of papers that spilled from it. 

“To whom is he writing at this time?” Hokuto thought as Taiga started grinding his own ink. Taiga had gotten thinner in his time in Jizhou; his mochi cheeks were gone and his hair looked dry and unkempt. 

A lot has changed since Hokuto returned from the dead; he didn’t become the top rank, he had to go back to his hometown, and he never received a job posting until he signed up for the army. A lot has changed for Hokuto, and even though he was only looking at Taiga’s side profile, Hokuto could tell that Taiga had changed as much. The simple thing of grinding an ink meant Taiga had become more independent, Kochi wasn’t even with him on this journey, and seeing Taiga write his own missive when he used to dictate those things to Hokuto felt so out-of-character of him. Who would have thought that not meeting at the Hall of Prominence back then was actually for the better? 

He felt Shintaro’s presence behind the tent and he took the tray before Shintaro could speak. He left the tray on the table and tried his best to change his voice and said, “Please have your dinner, Your Highness.”

He went out of the tent in haste and dragged Shintaro away from his older brother.  

“Do you know who our visitor was? They have like 23 carriages with them,” asked Shintaro, while he munched a bun, as they walked toward their barracks. 

“I have no idea,” he said. He could assume, though, that Taiga had finally been called back to the Capital. 

“So, why did the Commandant call you earlier?” He asked to keep Taiga out of his mind. 

“That…” Shintaro paused, which was so unlike him to think before he speaks. “Well, the Commandant kind of knew my mother,” he added awkwardly.

“Ah,” he replied without interest. It was no wonder the Commandant didn’t even show his respects to Taiga. “Is your mother ordering you to go back?” 

“No, not that,” Shintaro said quickly. “The Commandant promised not to tell where I am, but he just wants to know if I want to join the training for soldiers to be stationed at Fort Caserta–”

“No!” Hokuto yelped with caution. “We will lose the war.”

“Easy,” said Shintaro, gesturing to Hokuto to pipe down as they reached the barracks. “Do you want to get whipped? Worse, charge for treason! Why would you say we will lose?” 

“I’m sorry,” he said, sighing. “That was premature.” But true, he wanted to add. 

The Great Ying would suffer huge losses from the war. Thousands of men would perish. Three of their mighty generals would be killed and hanged by the enemies for everyone to see. Provinces, especially those far from the Capital, would plunge into famine. And in a weird twist, His Majesty’s trusted Diviner would foresee that a royal marriage of the Crown Prince would cure the chaos that His Majesty designed. 

“May the devil take that Diviner!” He might not be by Taiga’s side, but recalling that blasted Diviner made Hokuto want to strangle someone. 

“I know you’re worried, Hokuto. But don’t worry, you can stay here, you’re not really a soldier, " Shintaro continued. “The Diviner was positive, as told by the stars, bones, and stalks that we would win this.”

Hokuto sighed. Reasoning with Shintaro was moot. None of them read what he read during his years at the Ministry of War. The reports from surviving soldiers and higher officials painted a truly cunning and ruthless strategy of their enemy. Reports also concluded someone from their side was a mole; interrogations with borderline torture were done, some paid for their life, but ultimately, no one had solid proof of the mole. 

“Who is the mole? How to outsmart The Great Plains?”

“I heard the Grand Tutor will be helping the Ministry for strategy–”

“The Grand Tutor, although wise, is old and reluctant to change. He still sees the Great Plains like a cockroach he can step on.”

“So don’t think too much about it.”

Hokuto turned to the Second Prince. Although his body became hardened with hard work, his eyes still carry that innocent glow, and that shine would dim because of the war. 

“No, we don’t need the Grand Tutor,” he told Shintaro that made the Second Prince cross his thick eyebrows. “I have a better strategy,” Hokuto announced, snapping his fingers.

“Uhm, you?”

Hokuto could only smile as Shintaro looked at him as though he’d gone mad. 

“Maybe we can actually win this…” He whispered as he looked back to the tent where Taiga was. 

***

“Your Highness, here’s your medicine.”

Taiga quickly covered the letter he was writing with another parchment. “Didn’t I tell you to just leave it there?”

“When did you tell me?” asked Yui innocently as the herby smell wafted toward him. 

“I could have sworn you were here earlier–”

“Drink it while it’s warm,” said Yui. 

Taiga sighed. He clipped his nose before he drank the concoction straight. “This medicine will never get better.”

“And look, Your Highness, they left proper food. I guess the Commandant isn’t that much of a brute.” 

He looked at the selection of mutton soup, pine mushrooms and osmanthus cake, and he couldn’t help but smile bitterly. “The army has more budget than we.” Their earliest months in Jizhou were the worst; food was so scarce and anything that could be eaten was covered with volcanic ash that even if they managed to fish, the fish’s insides would be rotten. 

“Your Highness, you’re writing again, but will you ever send those?” 

Taiga glanced at his table and took a bite of osmanthus cake. “Those will be sent once we reach the Capital.” 

“Oh, where will it be sent?” 

“At some temple.”

“Temple? So all this time you were writing letters to a monk?” 

He sighed and picked the pine mushrooms. “You ask a lot of questions. Have you checked the others if they were sent food or are already sleeping?” 

“Oh yeah, I shall return immediately, Your Highness.”

He waited until Yui was out of the tent before he resumed writing; his eyes lingered at the addressee, “Hokuto.”

***

3 years later, 569 AD – Year of the Earth Ox

The streets were adorned with silk ribbons in colors of azure and red; colors symbolizing His Majesty and His Armies that became victors from what would be recorded in history as the “War of the Greats”. Taiga could only smile as he saw the people in a jovial mood. There had been lots of changes since he had gotten a new life; he exposed the Wus, he got exiled, his mother is still alive, and most of all, Great Ying won the war. 

“Your Highness, please refrain from showing your face,” his steward, Yui, said as he shut the windows of his carriage.

“You treat me like I’m an unmarried woman,” he complained. 

“You are unmarried, Your Highness, and your face could rival even the most beautiful woman.”

Taiga raised an eyebrow. “Did Kochi also teach you how to talk back?”

“Yes, Your Highness, Master Kochi gives us a lesson weekly.”

Taiga could only shake his head, his palace staff definitely feared Kochi more than him. 

“We’ve arrived, Your Highness.” 

“Ling’s Mansion” was proudly hung on the entrance. The house looked humble and unassuming, and as Taiga entered the courtyard, the mansion lacked the usual trifles found in most grand homes. One could say that the family that lived there was unmaterialistic. 

“Your Highness, you didn’t have to come personally; we could have gone in person,” Lord Ling said as he welcomed Taiga.

“It’s of no consequence. I would like to see your grandfather.”

“This way, Your Highness." 

They zigzag the huge mansion before they reached a hall in the middle of a man-made pond. The doors were opened, and Master Ling greeted him. 

“At ease, Master Ling,” said Taiga, helping the old man to get up. 

“Thank you, Your Highness.”

“I heard you arrived two nights ago. I could have given you more time to rest, but I’m just really excited. I apologized because it was hard for me to contain this excitement.” 

Master Ling just shook his head as he walked toward the rectangular chest in the middle of the room. Just like the mansion, the chest was just a simple maplewood that bore the seal of the Ling family on the side. 

“Forged with fire from Mount Mori, I present you…” 

Taiga found himself holding his breath as the chest opened and the silver gleam of the sword left him mesmerized. 

“Beautiful!” He lifted the scimitar, running his eyes over the curved blade. It was heavy but felt light when swung. 

“Per His Highness specifications, the handle is made by a magnolia tree, covered with shark skin, and at the pommel is the emerald you sent me.” 

“I expected no less from a master swordsmith."

“I’m humbled, Your Highness, and if I may ask a question?”

“What is it?” He asked, still admiring the sword. 

“Are you giving this to the Second Prince?”

Taiga smiled. In his past life, he kept his distance from Shintaro. He didn’t hate his younger brother, but their mothers made sure they would never have a warm relationship. It was too late when he learned that out of all his siblings, Shintaro was the only one who cared. 

“What made you say that?” 

Master Ling smiled and pointed at the emerald stone. “You’re the White Tiger represented by a diamond, while the Second Prince is the Forest Bear represented by the color of the trees, green and thus, emerald.” 

“You’re right, master, I’m gifting this to my brother. He deserves it not just for winning the war, but for coming back alive.” 

“I’m positive the Second Prince would love it. Have you thought of a name for the sword?” 

Taiga cocked an eyebrow. “I get to name it?” 

“The gifter, or the one who commissioned the sword to be made, should name it. What do you plan to call the scimitar, Your Highness?” 

He lifted the sword at eye level until he could see his reflection. “They say that the volcanic fire from Mount Mori can purify even the darkest souls for reincarnation. The cycle of life and death. I shall call this--Samsara.”

***

Hokuto felt the chill through his bones as cheers erupted left and right. He held the reins tight as handkerchiefs and ribbons got thrown at him. 

“Relax, Hokuto!” Shintaro shouted from the front. “Just enjoy this!” He added as he waved and threw kisses to the crowd. 

Hokuto feigned a cough. He felt nauseous. Never in his life did he dream he would be in a parade in the capital with the citizens cheering for them. He thought he even heard someone shout his name. 

“When will this be over?” He kept his eyes peeled in front, maybe if he just ignored everyone, time would fly and the next thing he knew, he would be back at Master Pei’s home. 

“Hokuto!”

He searched for the owner of the voice and saw his parents, younger brother, and Master Pei among the crowd. He smiled for the first time since the heroes' parade started and waved at his family. He kept his eyes on them even when his horse passed by them. 

“Younger brother, I hope you’re proud of your older brother now.” 

He returned his eyes to the front. He could now see the Palace of Dawn, its amber walls glistening like topaz when hit by the sun. He felt his hands sweat and grow colder. The parade was just the tip of the iceberg; the bigger challenge would be the banquet later, for he would surely meet Taiga again.

He looked at Shintaro. The Second Prince was clearly enjoying the attention, and in turn, the public seemed enamored of the Forest Bear.

He held the reins tight as he mumbled an apology, “I’m sorry, Taiga, because in this lifetime, I’ll help Shintaro become the Crown Prince.” 

Year 569 AD - Year of the Wood Dog

The Hall of Prominence truly lived up to its name; the hall glowed brighter than during the Winter Solstice celebration. Taiga bet half of the lanterns found in the capital had made their way to the hall, giving everyone’s complexion a luminescent glow, as well as some warmth from the chilly autumn night. Court ministers talked about endless politics, their sons talked about the resumption of the Civil Service Exam that was postponed due to war, and the mothers and daughters admired the pond below. Although the lotuses from the pond had dried due to the temperature drop, it was now filled with makeshift lotuses with tea candles in the middle. 

Taiga let out a sigh; the hall looked strangely unfamiliar to him. 

“Or maybe because I’m seeing it for the first time since I got back from the dead.” He should have been at the same hall for the panel interview. A couple of ministers' wives managed to catch him, quizzing him about Jizhou as though the place wasn’t real. 

“Is it true His Highness only drank wine in Jizhou since the water was contaminated?”

“I was surprised to see His Highness with black hair, everyone thought you’d have a head full of silver hair.”

Taiga didn’t know how he managed to smile and be polite as he answered questions one after another when His and Her Majesty’s presence was announced, and everyone knelt to pay their respects.

“Long live Your Majesty!”

He excused himself to return to his seat, while ignoring the glare from his mother, who didn’t like that he chose to wear blue-green rather than her clan’s coral for his garment tonight. He settled on his seat, the table to the left of the King, which offered him a wide-view of the eight empty seats where tonight’s honored guests would sit. 

The Minister of the Ministry of Rites remained standing as he announced, “The Legion of the Winged Dragon.” 

Drums echoed in the hall, evoking excitement with a hint of danger. Everyone could be seen smiling as they waited in anticipation for the eight key officials, all responsible for securing Great Ying’s win. 

Taiga smiled as he saw Shintaro enter the hall; his younger brother appeared dashing in his combat uniform, but he looked nervous on such a formal occasion. Leading the pack was General Zhi, the Commandant of Balmoral Garrison, whom Taiga didn’t get to see back then. His eyes roamed to more unfamiliar faces in the military until the eighth member of the legion appeared. Taiga felt like the drums were right in his heart as he interlaced his fingers and pressed them for strength. 

“And we met again in this hall…”

Unlike the others in their combat uniforms, the 8th member was dressed in a powdered blue traditional robe of a scholar, while on his right hand was a feathered fan, signifying his role as the legion’s strategist.

“Hokuto, just what twisted fate is this?” 

The eight soldiers stood in a straight line and bowed to the King. “We are grateful for His and Her Majesty’s honor. Long live Your Majesty!” 

The King stood. “Taiga, join me.” 

Taiga simply nodded; he didn’t trust himself to speak. The drums have quieted, but his insides remained in turmoil. Eunuchs lined behind them, all of them holding a tray with a gift for the eight soldiers. His Majesty presented them each with a reward, and the King lingered when it was Shintaro’s turn. 

“Second Prince, Shintaro, from today onwards, you will also be known as ‘The People’s General’,” His Majesty announced and gave Shintaro “The Dragon’s Claw”, a legendary dagger rumored to be made of dragon’s bones and pure silver and forged from the fire of Mount Evee.

“May the Dragon’s Claw serve as a talisman to protect and to defend the people,” His Majesty added. 

“Thank you, Your Majesty. Thank you, Your Highness.” 

Taiga managed to nod, but his face remained frozen. Shintaro was the first one to acknowledge his presence while the others treated him as invisible. 

“If the Second Prince is the youngest general, you are this nation’s youngest strategist,” said the King to Hokuto. 

“I am most humbled, Your Majesty. I am still inexperienced, but I always wanted to share your burden.”

“Sucking up, are we?” Taiga thought with disbelief. 

The King laughed as though it was the funniest joke he had heard. “I’ve said a lot, so I’m leaving this to the Crown Prince. What can you say to the Great Ying’s newest and youngest strategist?” 

Taiga could only thank his mother that he could maintain this much grace under pressure as he looked Hokuto in the eyes. The Hokuto in front of him only knew him as the passing merchant he saved at The Veil of Sorrow, and not his lover in a past life. 

Taiga took Hokuto’s reward from the eunuch and fate sometimes worked in mysterious ways. In his hand is a jade hairpin shaped like a sea dragon. Its fangs were carved gold, and its eyes were the tiniest moonstone. In the past, Hokuto received the same hairpin when he scored the highest in the Civil Service Exam; now, he would be receiving the same award as a military strategist. 

“Legend has it that the sea dragon could swim between realms and time: heaven, hell, and the mortal realm. And in between the past, the present, and the future. I don’t know how much of that is true, but in between time and space, some things will make it back to their rightful owner. Sharing His Majesty’s burden is noble and righteous. May the sea dragon help you glide swiftly even through the strongest currents, and with that, I hope that this nation will never betray your sacrifices. May the waves be kind, and if not, may you be strong enough to break through them.”

Hokuto lowered his head as Taiga pushed the hairpin through Hokuto’s top bun. 

“His Highness’s wisdom is unmatched. I’m much obliged to His Highness and to His Majesty.”

Taiga stepped back, the banquet resumed, but Taiga had lost his appetite. 

***

“Some things will make it back to their rightful owner…” Hokuto touched the jade hairpin on his head. Taiga couldn’t have known that Hokuto received the same hairpin when he became the top scorer in the Civil Service Exam. 

He sighed and glanced at the extravagant dishes in front of him. He glanced at Taiga’s side; the Crown Prince hadn't touched his food and just kept on drinking. He knew Taiga could carry his alcohol, but his temperament could be greatly altered.

“Or maybe I’m thinking about the Taiga I once knew; maybe he’s different now?”

Taiga looked ethereal in his blue-green formal court attire. When Hokuto first entered the hall, it was so easy to ignore the rest as his eyes were instantly drawn to Taiga. Whatever weight Taiga had lost the last time Hokuto saw him, Taiga had managed to bounce back. Taiga also kept his back straight, even though Hokuto knew the blue travel crown on his head was heavy.

“Do you like my older brother?” 

Hokuto almost choked even though he had nothing in his mouth. “Who gave you that idea?” 

“You keep looking at him,” said Shintaro, grinning. 

“Well, you looked so different as brothers,” he said as an excuse.

“Good for him to inherit the Queen’s beauty, instead of the King’s square jaw.”

“You’re very manly,” Hokuto complimented as he reached and brushed Shintaro’s thick eyebrows. 

“I recall when I revealed who I am; you weren’t even surprised.”

He smiled inwardly. Why would he? “I wasn’t sure if you were joking.”

“Kinda wild, is it?” They toast their cups, giggling at how life turned out for them. 

The sword dance ended with a resounding applause; Hokuto clapped too, even though his mind was elsewhere. His and Her Majesty bid them good night, and the mood inside the hall instantly shifted. It was as though they had been choked earlier, and now they could breathe freely. 

Hokuto quickly grabbed his wine pot and cup and headed toward Taiga. Incidentally, Shintaro had the same idea, as well as mothers foisting their single daughters. Taiga drank and chatted to a couple of mamas before he started backing away toward the exit. His attendant, whom Hokuto recalled as the same attendant with him at the garrison, was quite good at dodging the minister’s wives as Taiga made haste toward the bridge. 

Hokuto and Shintaro locked eyes as they nodded in understanding that the only way they could reach Taiga was to beat the Crown Prince. They ran out of the hall, and they were both catching their breath upon reaching Taiga’s palanquin. 

“Your Highness,” said Hokuto as Taiga arrived, who was also catching his breath from running.

“Older brother,” said Shintaro. 

“May we have a toast?” They both asked. 

Taiga eyed Hokuto curiously and said, “I’ve already given you my name; there was no need to be so formal.”

“Huh?” mumbled Shintaro, confused. “You guys have met before? Where? When?” 

Hokuto smiled uncomfortably. He didn’t expect Taiga to reveal that even to Shintaro. Judging by the redness of Taiga’s cheeks, he was deeply drunk, but kudos to him for still walking straight.

“I wouldn’t dare utter your name, Your Highness.”

“And what would you dare?” asked Taiga, to which Hokuto didn’t have a retort. 

“Probably date you, older brother,” said Shintaro, laughing at his joke, as Hokuto glanced uncomfortably toward Taiga and sensed that even the Crown Prince looked discomfited.

“Chill, it's just a joke,” Shintaro added, sensing their discomfort. Hokuto felt awkward simply because he had dated Taiga, but why would Taiga also appear uneasy? It wasn’t like Taiga planned on dating him.

“Let’s just all drink!” Shintaro shouted, he handed Taiga a cup, and they all made a toast to each other. 

“May this time of peace be long and prosperous,” said Taiga before he gulped his drink. 

“May His Highness’s wishes be fulfilled,” Hokuto commented before downing his cup. 

“Pay me a visit tomorrow, Shintaro; you may come too, Hokuto.” 

Hokuto simply nodded as they watched Taiga board his palanquin and disappear into the night.

***

Taiga was down on his knees as soon as he entered his palace. Kochi came running and worriedly touched his face.

“Why are you so pale? Did you get poisoned? Call the Royal Physician!”

“I’m fine,” he said, sounding grave. “I just haven’t eaten.”

Kochi sniffed closer. “You reeked of alcohol. How could you just drink? Yui, get His Highness some steamed buns.”

“What’s the drama?” whispered Kochi once Yui was out of the room. “There are always lots of reasons for you to be this upset, especially with the King and Queen near you. I told you to just go with coral.”

Taiga scoffed. “Surprise, it's not the usual,” he said as he lay on his heated floor.

“Interesting. If not them, who else could make you lose your appetite?”

Taiga sighed. He couldn’t tell Kochi about the past; Kochi would surely think the alcohol gave him delusions.

“I’ve met the young strategist everyone was talking about,” he said instead. 

“Is it someone I know?”

“Matsumura Hokuto.”

“Oooh! Same person as your Veil of Sorrow savior?!” He said with disbelief. “But wait, he’s the strategist? Isn’t he young?”

“I think he’s 25…or 26,” he replied, pretending to be unsure of Hokuto’s age.

“Military family?”

“Merchants.”

“And he’s that knowledgeable in the art of war?”

Taiga shrugged. “Well, he is Master Pei’s student; maybe he is really that gifted.”

Kochi didn’t appear impressed. He even looked suspicious. “This Matsumura- how sure are we that he's not a spy?” 

Taiga rolled over and lightly punched Kochi. “Don’t accuse someone without proof. He’s definitely not a spy!” 

Kochi squinted his eyes. “You’re even more suspicious for defending him this quickly.” 

Taiga stammered in his reply. “H--he saved my life before, remember?”

“Because he was just passing by?”

“Are you trying to say he also planned the dust storm and for me to fly off the carriage?” 

Kochi snapped his fingers. “You did say he was working in a mine where the dust storm started,” said Kochi, sounding more convinced. 

“He is not a spy!” He said with finality. 

“Okay,” said Kochi, but Taiga could sense he hasn’t given up. “If he’s not a spy…then he must be a sage who has seen the future.” 

Kochi’s analogy made Taiga pause as his heart thudded as loudly as the drums earlier. “That’s even crazier,” he commented, but lacking in energy, unlike earlier. 

“But anyway, this Matsumura is out,” Kochi concluded.

“What do you mean, out?”

“He might have saved your life before, but he can’t help you with your grand ambitions for the simple reason that he’s on the Second Prince’s side. Anyway, where is Yui? What’s taking him so long to get a steamed bun? I’ll go check.”

Taiga patted his tummy as it continued to ramble. Kochi is right; Hokuto is no longer on his side. He pushed Hokuto away the moment he stepped back during the Civil Service Exam. Although the results weren’t on par with his expectations, Hokuto would have a better life outside Taiga’s circle.

“This is what I wanted, right?” He hugged his knees as his rambling noises pacified the drum beats in his heart. “Fate can only be changed if I do it differently.”

***

“So that’s how you met my brother!” 

Hokuto just nodded as Shintaro got drunker and rowdier.

They’ve left the hall and gone straight to the Ministry of War, where the soldiers are having another banquet. The crowd of their fellow soldiers was definitely better than the stiff court officials, who might be smiling at them, but their eyes said otherwise. Soldiers like Shintaro and he were either used as a sword or a shield, and nothing in between.

“Who would have thought my older brother got some adventurous bone in his body?”

Hokuto silently agreed. The Taiga, he knew, would never be that reckless. Maybe the Taiga of this lifetime had changed. 

“Remember when we first met at the mine pit?” asked Hokuto.

“Of course, why?”

“Is your older brother the one you said you want to protect, and the one you don’t want to be threatened by you?”

Shintaro paused and took his time answering, “Yeah…but I need to be stronger. I don’t think I’m strong enough to be his blade.”

Hokuto took a sip of his wine and weighed his words carefully. “Why be someone else’s blade when you can be your own blade?”

Shintaro stared at him, his eyebrows crossed. “I must be drunk, I don’t get what you mean.”

“His Majesty called you ‘The People’s General’. Do you know what that means?”

“I am the People’s General? What else could it mean?”

“It means you have the people and His Majesty’s support if you rally for the throne–”

Plates and glasses broke as Shintaro flipped the table and the chatting nearby descended to confused silence. Hokuto braved to look up as Shintaro grabbed his collar.

“This conversation never happened,” Shintaro warned before storming off. Hokuto just watched Shintaro leave. His hands both clenched into fists.

“I’m afraid this conversation will happen again,” Hokuto murmured as he started cleaning the mess. “Taiga may have changed, but he can never be the king.”

“Samsara!”

Taiga watched Shintaro do a sword dance with more life and agility than the performers did last night.

“I really prefer a scimitar over a sword; it's more efficient for cuts and slashes.”

Taiga smiled. “I’m glad you like it, so, uhm, where’s Hokuto?” He asked, hoping he sounded more casual than inquiring.

“Hokuto…” Shintaro avoided his eyes, and if Taiga could hazard a guess, the two had a spat. “His family arrived in the Capital, he must be touring them.”

“I see,” said Taiga, sipping his tea. Kochi arrived with osmanthus cakes, as though Shintaro and he weren’t drowning in the variety of sweets on the table yet. 

“Congratulations on your new title, The People’s General!” Kochi said to Shintaro and Taiga saw his brother flinch. 

“Uhm, no need to call me that. Woot, more cakes?!” Shintaro grabbed one and started filling his stomach. Taiga watched his brother with curiosity. Shintaro didn’t seem to care when their father gave him that honorary title yesterday, so what changed in less than 24 hours? 

“So, Your Highness, since this Matsumura isn’t present, care to share how you defeated the Grasslands Guards of the Great Plains?” asked Kochi.

Taiga widened his eyes at Kochi. He should have known Kochi had other plans than just delivering sweets. Kochi ignored his glare and just mouthed, “Spy?” at him.

“Well, I’m not sure which part I am allowed to share…” Shintaro started.

“I understand, Your Highness,” said Kochi, looking downcast. “It doesn’t seem right for the Crown Prince to pry into the legion’s war tactics. It might send a different message to those with malicious minds.”

Taiga rolled his eyes. Kochi is really good at making someone feel bad for not doing him a favor.

“Pay Kochi no heed,” said Taiga, giving his Chief of Household a look not to push it.

“No, it's fine,” said Shintaro with a zeal that matched his stern face. “Why can’t I tell you? You’re the Crown Prince, and someday you will lead this nation. You shouldn’t be kept in the dark!”

Taiga glanced uncomfortably at Kochi, who just shrugged his shoulders as though he didn’t prod Shintaro.

“I won’t go into boring details, but until the decisive battle that became the turning point of this war, I really thought we would lose. General Mir was prepared to behead Hokuto on his own.”

Taiga and Kochi exchanged shocked glances. 

“Until the Battle in Berowra Waters, where Hokuto had a breakthrough and he later confided that he finally sniffed out the mole.”

“There’s a traitor on our side?!” Kochi clarified.

Shintaro nodded his head grimly. “All his strategies were just to find the mole, and when he was positive, he laid out the decisive battle plan that turned the tide.”

“And who is the mole?” asked Taiga. “Were they caught?”

“Probably not,” Kochi interjected. “If they were, their heads would have been paraded throughout the Capital.” 

“Hokuto only revealed the mole’s identity to General Mir and Lieutenant Fahar, and I swear, I have no idea of the mole's identity. The mole was caught…”

Taiga and Kochi braced themselves for a possible shocker. “...but he was pardoned.” 

“What?!” Kochi exclaimed louder than Taiga. “Pardoned just like that? By whom–” 

“You don’t have to ask that, Kochi,” Taiga cuts in. “Who could be that powerful to pardon someone so easily?” He began tapping a finger as his mind raced; the mole was definitely someone known to His Majesty. 

“Hmmm, should I send an official invitation to Matsumura for tea?” asked Kochi and Shintaro jumped in. 

“Why would you invite him over? Are you going to ask him about the mole?” asked Shintaro, looking so worried that Taiga thought it wasn’t just about the mole. 

“Shintaro is right, Kochi. We will be implicating him if we start asking questions. Don’t worry, little brother,” he said with assurance. “What happens in the military stays in the military.” 

Shintaro smiled gratefully, while Taiga could see Kochi making calculations in his head. 

“Your Highness, Tanaka Juri has arrived,” Yui reported. 

“Send him to my study. Excuse me, Shintaro, I have business to attend to.”

“No worries, big brother, I have to visit my mother as well.” 

“Send my regards to Consort Azusa, I’ll see you around.”

***

“Your Highness!” 

“Welcome back to the Capital, Juri.” He sat across from Juri as Yui started serving tea and sweets. 

“The Capital has this certain scent that makes me go, ‘Yeah, I’m really home’,” said Juri as he started sipping his tea.

“What scent is that?” 

Juri smiled sleazily. “The scent of sin.” 

Taiga shook his head. He used to be shocked at Juri’s bluntness and his tendency to make sexual innuendos, but not anymore. 

 “I think sin smells differently for you and me.”

“What does His Highness mean?”

“For me, sin reeks of blood and death. As for you, it's what goes on in pleasure quarters.”

Juri grinned. “Your Highness, I’m loyal to the Princess Royal,” he said, pertaining to Taiga’s older sister. Juri had set his sights on the Princess Royal when the princess almost accidentally killed Juri with a bow during the hunting season. 

Taiga scoffed. “You have weird tastes in women. Anyway, you’ve been gone for a year.”

Juri nodded. “I’ve investigated the Wus and anyone close to them, and after a year, I haven’t found anything that could be tantamount to an impending rebellion.”

“Really?” Taiga felt conflicted. If there were no rebellion, then this mother would be safe. But after waiting and preparing for a possible rebellion, he felt all his efforts were wasted.

“Affirmative,” said Juri. “Although I wouldn’t deny they have their share of shady dealings, I saw nothing resembling planning an attack against the crown. They still hoard grains, but they’ve never had meetings with officials except with their usual circle. And as for the iron they mined, a huge portion was donated to our side during the war.”

He started tapping a finger on the table. Did the Wu really give up on overthrowing the crown? Will the Queen be safe just as Great Ying won the war?

“I can do another check, but I have to do it at another angle, like the, uhm, the inner court? Consort Wu could be building a private army there.”

Taiga cocked an eyebrow. “Are you going to be a eunuch or are you going to enter as a maid?”

Juri quickly closed his legs. “Definitely not a eunuch, my family needs my jewels. I think I’ll look and do horribly as a maid, so how about a medical attendant?”

“Medical attendants in the inner court are all cut.”

“Really?!” Juri looked unbelievably shaken. 

“Of course they have to be. But let's not worry about the affairs of the inner court. I want to believe the Queen is pretty able to keep the inner chambers in check. I have a new task for you.”

“Say it.”

His thoughts returned to what Shintao had shared. His gut instinct was telling him the mole could be related to his past and, ultimately, his future. 

“General Mir, Lieutenant Fahar…” He clenched his fist and added with a sigh, “And Matsumura Hokuto. Watch them and report if they’ve met anyone belonging to the King’s circle.”

***

Hokuto’s mother had only been in the Capital for a week, yet she managed to land him a dinner date with the daughter of a Marquis, no less. 

“I hope you don’t mind that I changed the location. I prefer meeting at a theater rather than in any of the restaurants,” Miss Shen said as Hokuto was guided to his seat. 

“This is fine, Lady Shen.” He preferred not to talk anyway. It was his first time at the Villi Theater, the said place also existed in his past, but he only visited it once. 

“With Taiga…” 

“Are you familiar with the ‘Forbidden Romance in the Inner Chamber’?”

“I’m afraid not,” he lied. Not only was he familiar with the play, but he even knew the playwright. 

“I assumed you wouldn’t, Mr. Matsumura, a military advisor like yourself would not be interested in whimsical stuff such as this.”

“You think highly of me. I find these stories fascinating as well.”

“I didn’t think you would find something as scandalous as fascinating.”

He smiled genuinely for the first time that night. “I think palace life is too constricting, a bit of scandal might actually be a breather.”

“True that, but I hope that kind of romance doesn’t find me. It’s a good story to tell, but I’d rather keep my head intact.” 

He turned to Miss Shen, who appeared too insightful for her young age. 

“I hope so, too, Miss Shen. Most people easily throw their lives away for that bit of romance.” He could hear someone laughing sarcastically on other floors, and it might as well be directed at him. 

The play started, and Lady Shen moved closer to the balcony. Hokuto remained in his place; he already knew how the play would run, so his eyes ran to other boxes on their level until he locked eyes with Taiga.

Hokuto found himself unable to move. Taiga sat in his own box, directly across from where he and Miss Shen sat. Taiga wasn’t alone; next to him was Tanaka Juri, who looked bored at the play, yet his arms were not only comfortably around Taiga, his face was also resting on Taiga’s shoulder.

Juri took the top spot in the last Civil Service Exam; he took Hokuto’s old position too, and, judging from Taiga and Juri’s closeness, could Juri have also taken Taiga’s heart?

Hokuto nodded in acknowledgement, Taiga did too, and Hokuto resumed pretending the play interested him. However, his eyes might be on the play, but his mind remained on the box across from him. He drank his wine straight. He and Taiga are no longer involved with each other. He shouldn’t care, Taiga’s business is no longer his. After all, he’s plotting for Taiga not to ascend the throne- why is he acting like the aggrieved one?

The applause in the theater made him realize it was over. Taiga’s box is now empty, while Miss Shen didn’t care about his invitation for a walk. He was glad she rejected him because he only asked out of politeness. He also rejected her offer to drop him off at Master Pei’s house and chose to walk on his own.

The night is colder than usual, and Hokuto wishes he had dressed warmer. Carriages sped by, but one matched his walking speed.

“Did you enjoy the play, Hokuto?”

He paused, startled by hearing Taiga’s voice. He looked at the carriage next to him; the windows remained drawn, and he wondered if Juri was also in the carriage.

“It was interesting,” he said as he resumed walking. 

“Interesting is something you say out of politeness rather than genuine interest.” 

Hokuto faltered in his steps. Did Taiga read his mind, or was he speaking in general?

“Well, it's the first time I’ve seen such a play; thus, regardless of the story, the general experience was interesting.”

“More interesting than Miss Shen?”

Hokuto didn’t need to ask; Taiga had everyone’s family tree written in his head.

Taiga continued, “The Marquis’ daughter is indeed a beauty, but isn't she too young for you? I think she’s only 16.”

Taiga’s queries made Hokuto smile. It would be delusional to think Taiga could be jealous. 

“This meeting was set up by my mother, and as far as I’m concerned, it’s nothing but innocent.” He wanted to ask Taiga about Juri, but he couldn’t.

“I see, uhm, so when can I expect you at my palace? You should have gone with Shintaro yesterday.”

Shintaro hasn’t spoken to him since the night of the banquet, and he didn’t want to visit Taiga’s palace on his own. In fact, he didn’t want to visit Taiga’s palace at all. The place held so many memories only he could remember.

“My family is still in the Capital, and they’ve been very demanding of my time. I think my visit to His Highness will be more delayed.”

“It’s okay. I guess there’s no helping it then–”

“Oi, move faster!” 

Hokuto glanced back and saw a few carriages being held back because of Taiga’s carriage speed. 

“I guess I’ll see you around, Hokuto. Yui, kick it!” 

Taiga’s carriage sped up, and Hokuto also picked up his pace. He reached his master's house, and he could finally let out a sigh of relief. He was being followed, but they remained in the shadows–for now.

***

“People’s General?! Your father really had to make it obvious who he’d rather support!”

Taiga sighed. “Please pacify yourself, Queen Mother. It was just a title, and the Second Prince deserved it.” The title didn’t even register with Taiga when the King said it; his mind was in a whirlwind at the thought of facing Hokuto, so the King’s words became white noise. When it finally registered to him, he expected this backlash from his mother. 

“I don’t care what he deserved, but he can’t have the people’s backing.” 

Taiga sighed once more. “Although Shintaro is becoming more popular in the public, he is my brother, and I’m confident that I have his support–”

“Fool!” The Queen screamed, her cheeks reddened. “All your brothers are your competition. I can’t have the Second Prince be seen in a better light.” 

Taiga hated to ask, “And what do you propose, Queen Mother? Should I start a war and lead an army as well?”

The Queen’s nostrils flared at his insolence. “You’re not allowed to hurt yourself. You’re my only heir, if only I had another son.” 

He clenched his hands on his knees. He was always the heir and never the son. 

“That’s why I went to the temple to pick an auspicious date.” 

He felt the vein on his temple pop. When someone says “auspicious”, it’s usually not favorable to the person directly involved. 

“A date for what?” 

“Your marriage, of course! Since we’re celebrating winning the war, why don’t we amp it up and have you marry as well? In this way, the public would forget all about the war and Shintaro and would focus on your marriage instead.” 

He dug his nails into his knees. The Great Ying won the war. The Wus looked like they weren’t planning a rebellion. But what do you mean his blasted after-war wedding might still happen?

“I’ve found suitable women from families in our faction. All you need to do is choose. Just one for now, we'll have more consorts once you’re the king.” 

“I refuse, mother…”

“What, you were saying something?”

He looked up and braced himself to get slapped. “I don’t want to get married.” 

He thought his soul was almost separated from his body as his mother’s fan made contact with his face. His mother’s chief lady-in-waiting went to his side and knelt. 

“I beg Her Majesty to temper her anger, Her Majesty’s health hasn’t been the best.” 

The Queen yelled, “I might as well die as to suffer such insolence!” 

“Your Majesty, please, calm yourself. Your Highness, please be mindful of your words to Her Majesty.” 

Taiga refused to speak because he knew his mother would never accept his decision. 

“I wasn’t asking you, Taiga, I’m ordering you.” 

“Would His Majesty agree?” 

His mother’s eyes widened. Taiga knew his father wouldn’t agree, he wouldn’t agree to anything that could make Taiga and the Queen’s faction more powerful. 

“You are really set to be this unfilial?” 

He swallowed the lump in his throat. “Filial pertains to the son’s duties to their parents. But am I your son, mother? Am I not just your tool to take the throne?” 

“You–!”

“I promise you, mother, I’ll be the king, but please, please trust me that I can do this on my own.” 

The Queen didn’t say anything, while Taiga could see his clenched fists had turned white. 

“I think I’ve spoiled you,” the Queen said after a while. “Fuyou!” She called her lady-in-waiting. 

“Yes, Your Majesty.” 

“Since I’m being a parent to my son,” she said in clipped tones, “and my son is being impudent. It’s only right I punish this son. Give him 33 lashes!” 

“Your Majesty, that is—” 

“--or so until he says he’s going to get married.” 

He let out a long sigh. Being crippled beats being married. “Thank you, Your Majesty, for your unbounded generosity.”

He was led outside his mother’s palace. A long wooden stool sat in the middle of the courtyard, while Eunuch Li stood with a whip in his hand. Taiga saw the panic in Yui’s face, and he mouthed, “Call Kochi” as his mother’s maids placed him on the torture chair. His bottoms were rolled up until he could feel the chilling breeze on his lower leg.

“I’m asking you again, are you going to get married or not?” 

He shut his eyes and said, “No, Queen Mother.” 

“Then, Eunuch Li!” 

The first hit made him wince. It stung, but nothing that he hadn’t experienced before. He thought it would be an easy ride, but the fifth one made him curl his toes. The eight made him clench his insides. By the eleventh, he wished the pain would knock him out, because by the fifteenth, he slowly descended into madness. He could no longer see the Queen’s smug face; what he saw was someone who had been part of his dreams, or rather, his biggest nightmare. 

“Hokuto…”

Hokuto knelt in front of him and cupped his face, his eyes almost in tears as he whispered, “You deserve this pain, Taiga.” 

A fresh wave of pain hit Taiga. They came like lightning on a stormy night, hitting him repeatedly, some stronger than others, but every strike felt like oblivion. 

“I’m so sorry…”

He watched Hokuto’s sneer. His eyes mocked him. From gently cupping his face, Hokuto moved his hand to his neck, choking him as he struggled to breathe.

“Sorry? Your death is the only penance I will accept!” 

“I’m sorry…I’m sorry…I will never deserve your forgiveness…” Taiga continued to beg. The lines of reality became distorted, but the pain was real, piercing through his human body to torment him psychologically. And he could only hope for pain to kill him instead. 

***

“His Highness is currently visiting Her Majesty, please return another time.” 

“I see. Please give him this.” Hokuto gave Taiga’s maid the shirini he bought as a gift. He got the shirinis from Persian merchants, who had just begun their trade routes with Great Ying. He was about to leave Taiga’s courtyard when his carriage arrived. 

“Your High–” He didn’t get to say anything as Kochi came out of the carriage and started barking orders. An imperial guard rushed in, and Hokuto found himself holding his breath as an almost lifeless Taiga was carried out of his carriage. 

“Taiga!” He’d seen Taiga in such a state before, and the lashes on his exposed leg confirmed everything to him. The Queen had Taiga flogged. 

He rushed to the palace’s kitchen. The staff might be shocked by his presence, but no one really declined when he asked for a pork belly to be cut into thin slices. When he got his slices of pork, he returned to the main hall and went straight to Taiga’s bedroom. Some maids were in tears outside of Taiga’s room, while the imperial guard who had carried him earlier stood on duty by his door. 

“Uhm, I need to send this inside.”

The guard, who looked more foreign than local, looked at the pork slices and said with a straight face. “His Highness doesn’t eat raw pork.” 

Hokuto almost smiled. “It’s for his wound.” 

“Never heard of wound eating pork.”

“Uhm, the wound doesn’t really–”

“But okay, you look like you know what you’re talking about.”

The guard stepped aside. Hokuto wasn’t so sure how to proceed as he almost came barreling towards Kochi. 

“Oh…it’s you!” 

He made a quick bow and presented the pork slices. “I apologize, but I witnessed the commotion earlier. These pork slices can facilitate wound healing, place them after you clean the wound, leave them overnight, and tomorrow, you can apply salve.” 

Kochi didn’t seem so convinced. “Thank you for your concern but–”

An attendant came running. Hokuto recognized him as the attendant called Yui, who had been attending to Taiga lately.

“Master Kochi, the physician won’t go see His Highness. It seems like the Queen forbids him.”

Kochi scoffed. “When I said to get the physician, I meant by hook or crook. Jesse!”

“Here!” The guard replied.

“We have a physician to take! Let’s go.”

“Master Kochi, is that not kidnapping? Master…!”

Hokuto stood flabbergasted. He guessed some things never changed, Taiga’s household remained as chaotic as ever. He braved to enter Taiga’s chamber, and the spicy scent of agrimony wafted toward him. 

“Taiga…” He called softly as he stepped toward Taiga’s bed. He was covered in sweat even though he had nothing on but a blanket. Hokuto lifted the cover by Taiga’s lower leg and felt a squeeze in his heart.

He placed the pork slices on Taiga’s wound. He assumed the Queen’s eunuch did the flogging, and, looking at Taiga’s wound, the eunuch was quite sadistic. The eunuch could have hit Taiga in different areas, but he decided to strike the same area repeatedly, breaking the skin and almost ripping his flesh.

“I’m sorry…I’m sorry…” Taiga started murmuring.

“You did everything for the Queen, you should stop apologizing,” he replied, even though he knew Taiga couldn’t hear him. He brushed Taiga’s hair away from his face and took the dry cloth beside the wash basin. 

“Look at you, you even cried.” And Taiga never really cries, it must have hurt so badly that he was almost hysterical. 

“Is it really worth it, Taiga?”

Taiga’s eyes fluttered until they were wide open. He looked at Hokuto, stunned. Hokuto was about to call for a maid when Taiga held his hands tight.

“I’m sorry…” Taiga said again.

“Your Highness, I think you’re being delirious again, Kochi will return soon–”

“I failed you. I didn’t get to protect you. In the end, is my love for you nothing but empty words?”

His eyes widened as he grabbed Taiga’s shoulders. Taiga’s eyes looked like he’d been drifting between dream and reality, and Hokuto hoped he had assumed wrong.

His heart thudded hard. “What are you talking about, Taiga?!”

Taiga started weeping instead. “I’m sorry.”

“Taiga, focus, what are you–”

The door slid open, Kochi and Jesse came rushing in with the physician; tied, gagged, and carried like a sack on Jesse’s back.

“Physician’s here! Everyone out.” 

Hokuto wanted to stay, but he couldn’t do anything else as Jesse pushed him out of the room.

“I’m sorry, but His Highness is not in a state to see anyone.” 

Hokuto nodded as he’d been turned away again. It had been 5 days, and the Red Hill Palace was still not receiving visitors. It had been 5 days and Hokuto remained restless. He wanted to think he was only overthinking the words he heard Taiga say. His mind says it’s impossible, but his existence is proof it is possible.

“Taiga also returned from the past?”

 “Your insistence is admirable, it makes me want to help you.” 

Hokuto acknowledged Juri with a nod. They don’t personally know each other, but they have been introduced during the exams. Hokuto almost forgot Juri worked for the Secretariat if he hadn’t been wearing the Secretariat’s usual scholar robes. He was still unsure what relationship Taiga and Juri had, but after asking around, Hokuto learned that Juri was a lothario through and through. 

“Tanaka Juri,” said Hokuto. 

“Matsumura Hokuto,” said Juri. “You made me very rich after the exam.” 

Hokuto raised an eyebrow. “Pardon?” 

“My brothers all bet on you, shame on your ranking, but it's all in the past. I heard you’ve been appointed as a junior officer for the Ministry of War. Congratulations.” 

Hokuto managed a smile. He received the decree just before his family set off to return to Jinnian. “I guess fate has other plans.”

“I never expected you to believe in things like fate.” 

“When you reach my age, a lot of things we deem unbelievable start making sense.” 

“Your age?” Juri asked, frowning. “I thought we were born in the same year?” 

“Never mind about that. So you were talking about His High—Taiga.” He didn’t think of himself as petty, but Taiga already gave him his name, so why not use it? 

Juri sniggered. “His Highness may have given you his name, but you’re not the one by his side.” 

Hokuto found himself clenching his hands into fists. “Those by his side aren’t doing a good job protecting him.” 

“Maybe because His Highness doesn't want to be protected, he’d rather stake his life to protect his people. A ruler who protects his people isn’t so familiar, is it?” 

“That…” Hokuto had no comeback. The Taiga Juri talked about was such a stranger to Hokuto. Not that Taiga was self-serving, but the Queen brought him up that way. Protecting himself means protecting the Crown. 

“Anyway, I’m not here to compete or whatever,” said Juri. “His Highness left the palace 4 days ago to recuperate. Where? I have no idea.” 

Hokuto had an idea. Taiga has a grandfather who now lives at Hidden Clouds Temple. Not everyone knew about the former King’s half-brother, who was born to a palace maid. He could have competed for the throne, but he chose to be a monk and scarred his face as proof he would never try for the throne. 

“But I think you have more pressing matters, Matsumura,” whispered Juri, his face so close that Hokuto could see a couple of acne scars.  

“What do you mean?” 

Juri frowned. “Are you really innocent, or are you just pretending you don’t know someone has been following you?” 

Hokuto kept his face passive. If Juri knew about those who had been watching him, that could only mean Taiga was also having him watched. 

“But why? Is Taiga suspecting him again?” Memories of betrayal came like a deluge. He was worried for nothing when Taiga hadn't changed at all. 

“I have no idea who has been following me,” he said, which was the truth. He had guesses, but nothing confirmed. “But do tell Taiga this, he is right not to trust me.” 

***

The Hidden Clouds Temple gets its name literally because it is hidden in the clouds. Situated along the Bastion of Gods Mountain Ridge, the temple was believed to be the gods' stopover when they descended to the mortal realm. Despite its treacherous location, believers braved the journey to reach the temple, as it was also known to grant wishes and heal any ailment. 

“You could stay for another week. Your physical wounds have closed, but the other wounds are far from healing.”

Taiga looked softly at his grandfather, although he preferred to be called Monk Jicheng; to Taiga, he was more of a father than his actual father. 

“I should go back,” he said with a sigh. “I can’t run away forever.” 

“By the way, placing pork cuts rich in fat on your fresh wound was a folk remedy known around here; was that how you knew about it?”

“Was that how Hokuto knew about it?” He asked in his head. In the past, Hokuto and he learned about it together during their short stay at the temple. But Taiga also knew Hokuto for being widely read, maybe that was how he knew about the folk remedy. Or maybe Hokuto learned about it from the soldiers during the war. After all, they haven’t seen each other in 5 years, Hokuto’s world isn’t as small as it used to be.

“Unless…” He shook his head. He didn’t want to entertain the impossible. 

“I guess so…” he murmured. Just like the sea of clouds in front of him, his mind had been drifting like the clouds lately. The pain of being caned was temporary and easily forgettable, but the images he saw could torment him for eternity. He deserved Hokuto’s wrath in the past, the present, and the future. 

“Your Highness. Monk Jicheng. We’ve finished packing, we can leave anytime,” Yui reported.

Taiga stood up and hugged his grandfather. 

“Thank you, Grandpa.”

“Your Highness, the world is vast, and although the cage is made of gold, your wings are not clipped. You can always fly away.” 

He smiled and touched the scar on his grandfather’s face. Royals with visible scars could never inherit the throne because royals had to be flawless in appearance, even if their insides were rotten. 

“I can no longer run away, I’m in it too deep. Ascending to the throne is the only way I know to make things right.” 

His grandfather paused and stared deep into his soul, almost as though he was praying for Taiga. “Then, this old man will support you wholeheartedly.” 

***

“I know you’ve been avoiding me since the banquet night,” said Hokuto to Shintaro. They "accidentally" met at Mirage, a famous restaurant in the capital specializing in fusion cuisine. It might look like an accident to Shintaro, but Hokuto paid someone handsomely to inform him if Shintaro dropped by. 

“I don’t see the reason why I should remain friends with people who want to harm my brother,” said Shintaro while he devoured a bowl of pork spare ribs. If Shintaro could still eat that well, it meant he wasn’t that angry yet. 

“I would never wish your brother any harm,” he said sincerely, and he wanted to add that it was Taiga who wanted to bring him harm. 

“That’s not what you said,” Shintaro said indignantly. “You’re just like everyone else, trying to drive a wedge between my brother and I. I’d rather kill myself than set my sights on the throne.” 

Hokuto smiled. He needed that kind of enthusiasm from Shintaro more than ever. “I advise that you don’t do that. Even if you step away, your other two brothers would just think they have a chance.”

Shintaro scowled. “Did something happen to you when you entered the palace? Did you hit your head? Why are you suddenly interested in the succession?” 

He looked Shintaro in the eyes. “Shintaro, do you think your brother is genuinely happy?” 

Shintaro remained scowling. “I told you before, my brother prioritized his duty above all. The throne might not be the happiest place on earth, but as long as he wants it, I’ll make sure he gets it.” 

“That’s disappointing,” said Hokuto and looking forlorn. “I thought you'd be the first one who would rather see your brother happy.”

“I may not agree with you, but I understand your disappointment with me. But how about you, Hokuto? What’s your relationship with my brother for you to act this way?”

He sighed. “It’s a long story, and you might not believe it.”

“I have all night–”

“There’s a fire at the palace!” 

They exchanged shocked looks as they stood up and ran out of Mirage. The Palace of Dawn was still far, yet they could see a black smoke on the horizon. 

“Western side, that’s where the inner chambers are,” said Shintaro. “Mother!” 

Hokuto stood frozen on the spot. The inner chambers didn’t catch fire in the past, but there was one major incident that happened around the same time this year.

“The Wu’s insurrection…the Queen!” 

***

“Your Highness, you didn’t have to walk to the Imperial Tombs, we’ve prepared–”

“I will walk,” Taiga said firmly as he held his mother’s memorial tablet in his hands. The unfinished edges of the hemp sackcloth he’d been wearing were starting to irritate his face, but he didn’t dare remove it; this was how he would mourn his mother. 

The seven-day vigil is over, and the grand funeral procession has started. Taiga expected the procession to be long and tedious. The King and his mother’s relatives prepared a chest of treasures to be buried with the Queen. Taiga never understood why such traditions existed, but he guessed his mother, who loved all gold and glitter, would welcome such comfort in the afterlife. 

He braved looking at the people on the side of the streets. They all looked at him with pity, some shed tears, and some threw flowers on his path. 

“Look, mother, you got your wish. The attention is no longer on the army and on the Second Prince but on you, on us.” 

The fire had long been put out when Taiga arrived at the palace, and his mother’s charred body had been moved to the office of the Imperial Coroner. He didn’t have time to cry; he had duties to do as the chief mourner. 

“I failed you, mother, I thought I could stop you from dying. I thought you would see me ascend the throne, I thought I could stop the inevitable. In the end, will my biggest fears happen again? What’s the point of going back? What’s the point of preparing for years if it will just happen again?”

His steps faltered, and Jesse quickly caught him. “Your Highness, we have a palanquin ready.” 

He pushed his arm away. “I’m okay. I will walk.” His steps grew heavy as though his ankles were chained. But he wanted to persevere. He had been unfilial, even if he had to crawl to the tomb, he would do so. 

His vision started to blur when they finally arrived at the 66 steps to the Imperial Tomb. Or maybe his vision wasn’t hazy because the dusk had arrived. Jesse helped him climb the 66 steps, while His Majesty and the Princess Royal also left their carriages to climb the rest of the way. 

The sunset looked vibrant on top of the Imperial Tomb. The sky even resembles his mother’s clan color – coral. He looked at the procession below and was mesmerized by the sheer number of offerings for his mother. 

The burial began, and with the treasures they had to fit in the tomb, it became more taxing than the procession. Eventually, His Majesty left. The Princess Royal left. But Taiga chose to stay until the last piece was loaded. It was dawn when the tomb was sealed, and his frosty morning began with the biting reality that his mother would never return. 

He knelt in front of the tomb and kowtowed once. 

“Mother, it has always been your dream to see me become king. Until, eventually, your dream also became my dream.”

He kowtowed for the second time. 

“Later, I realized, I never really knew how to dream. I was living your dream. Until I met him. I started having dreams of my own. Dreams you would surely forbid me.”

And he bowed for the third and last time. 

“And I met him again this time, Mother. I didn’t get to protect you, and your unfilial son is begging you, please, mother, help me to protect him. I don’t want him to suffer the same fate!”

A wave of dizziness almost knocked Taiga out as he raised his head when someone caught him. He expected it to be Jesse, but just like in the Veil of Sorrows, he just knew.

“Your Highness,” said Hokuto softly, “I apologize for being late in offering my condolences.” 

Taiga looked up and bit his lower lip. He hasn’t cried since his mother died, and he wouldn’t start crying now, especially in Hokuto’s arms. 

“It’s okay and thank you.” Taiga didn’t know how he managed to speak, and he was too weak to even protest when Hokuto carried him on his back. Jesse followed them silently, while Yui waited at the bottom beside his carriage. 

The 66 steps became doubly long as Taiga let his head rest on Hokuto’s shoulder; his scent relaxed him like a lullaby, and Taiga thought he would fall asleep when he was transferred to the palanquin.

“Rest well, Taiga,” Hokuto whispered as he left his carriage. 

“You finally dared to say my name,” Taiga wanted to say as his tears started falling. “Hokuto, more than ever, we really can’t be together.” 

***

The Crystal Court went into uproar when the Minister of the Ministry of Rites reported that the Crown Prince didn’t attend the meeting for the Queen’s upcoming 40 days. His Majesty declared a year of mourning for his Queen, and in a couple of days, it would be her 40th day since her passing. As a tradition, a “Soul Embracing” ceremony will happen on the 40th day, signaling that the Queen’s soul will forever leave the mortal world for the heavens, and the Queen’s children will be the center of the rite.

“The Crown Prince ignored all missives, Your Majesty. The Princess Royal had no idea about His Highness's whereabouts either. I’ve sent messengers to the Red Hill Palace, but they’ve all been turned away. I implore His Majesty to correct this disrespect for what makes Great Ying great,” the Minister reported.

A court official, whom Hokuto recognized as belonging to the late Queen’s faction, stepped up. “Please have mercy on His Highness, Your Majesty. It was no secret that Her Majesty and His Highness shared a special bond. His Highness must still be distraught. Please give him more time.”

The Minister wouldn’t back down. “But Your Majesty, His Highness is the future leader of this nation, we can’t have a leader who wallows in their grief–”

“The impudence to talk badly about His Highness! The ceremony will happen even without him!”

“That’s unfilial!”

Hokuto shook his head. Attending morning sessions to listen to court officials bicker like kids in need of their father’s attention is something he doesn’t relish.

He looked in the direction of Red Hill Palace. He’d been trying to see Taiga every week since the Queen’s burial. And just last week, Taiga’s attendant, Yui, admitted that even they had no idea where Taiga had gone. 

The sniping continued among the factions until His Majesty shouted, “Silence!”

Hokuto got down on his knees and joined everyone in begging for His Majesty’s mercy.

“I expect the Crown Prince to be present on the day of the ritual. If not, he shall be punished for being unfilial, 88 lashes on his back, and that’s final!”

No one argued or complained as they bid His Majesty goodbye. Hokuto stepped out of the court, intending to go to the Red Hill to warn them, when something caught his eye: the golden spire of the Lotus Harmony Pagoda. 

His mind says no, but his heart is set. 

***

“Cause of death:  punctured lung due to trauma (knife wound).”

Taiga read the coroner’s report over and over again, and nothing has changed. He and Juri had been blindsided; they were so focused on the Wus that the real enemy swooped in. He just didn’t understand why his mother was solely targeted. In the past, his mother died as a consequence of Wu's insurrection that happened on the night of the Mid-Autumn Festival celebrations. The King was also hurt, but his mother died more quickly due to loss of blood. The motive was clear back then, but now, Taiga had no idea. Reports say the fire started from the lanterns in the courtyard. The lanterns were prepared ahead of the Mid-Autumn Festival; the maids lit one for testing, but as one maid described, “the entire lantern became a fireball, and in the blink of an eye, it became an inferno.”

“So was the fire a complete accident? A fortunate accident for the killer…” He emptied another jar of wine. The wines should have been a betrothal gift to his future princess, and he decided not to waste them.

It would be his mother’s 40 days soon, and he still hadn’t got a clue when he heard the door below open. He quickly tiptoed to the room behind the scroll painting. The place was cleaned weekly; it had only been 3 days, so it should be empty of any human beings.

Taiga sat behind the door and hugged his empty wine jar. He wished whoever came in would finish their business quickly; the hidden room didn’t have a light source, and even though he didn’t believe in ghosts, he wasn’t fond of being alone in the dark.

He waited in stifling agony when he heard the unmistakable sound of the scroll painting being lifted. He withdrew his knife from his belt and let his unexpected visitor feel its cold steel on his throat.

“Who are you and how did you know about this room?”

“Of course I would know about this room…”

Taiga’s eyes widened. He wouldn’t mistake that voice as he held his breath. The door swung open, allowing light to shine on Hokuto’s unsmiling face.

“...after all, I’m the one who told you about this hidden room, Taiga.”